Jack B. Nimble

Here’s a pretty solid election rule. If one of the candidates has a Nazi tattoo, that’s the one you shouldn’t vote for!

Updating my LEGO White House

Jesus meme He protecc (Jesus holding lamb) He attac (Jesus flipping tables) But most importantly he become snac (communion)

I’m against the death penalty, but dudes like albert fish need to be executed. When you’re that much of a monster, prison justice isn’t good enough!

The other 99% of the time, just put ‘em in prison without parole.

Had to let em know how I felt before I blocked them lol

So uh, how about you go sit on a big fat dick?

FUCK YOU YOU FUCKIN’ FUCK!

Me: AI will dumb us down and kill us all. I have no hope for the future.

Also Me: ha ha, look at this video of John Lennon playing with Tonka Trucks on the Dick Cavett show!

“Welcome To My Nightmare” by Alice Cooper sounds like it could’ve been by the Doors

Chicago not letting Portland have all the fun 🐧

Ian Watkins made Gary Glitter look like Chris Hansen. Rest in piss bozo!

WGN-TV producer detained during ICE enforcement action in Lincoln Square A WGN-TV video editor and producer was roughly detained by two Border Patrol agents on Friday morning during a highly visible rush hour enforcement action in Lincoln Square.

A WGN-TV video editor and producer was roughly detained by two Border Patrol agents on Friday morning during a highly visible rush hour enforcement action in Lincoln Square.

For years, I wasn’t sure why we needed it, but it turns out that the 3rd Amendment is really useful!

Mike Johnson only wants Lee Greenwood to perform the halftime show at the Super Bowl because Lawrence Welk is dead and therefore unavailable.

Annual COVID Vaccines Save Lives, New Study Shows A new study shows that receiving an updated COVID vaccine reduced people’s risk of severe disease and death in all age groups, regardless of immunity from prior infection or vaccination

A new study shows that receiving an updated COVID vaccine reduced people’s risk of severe disease and death in all age groups, regardless of immunity from prior infection or vaccination

TikTok Edits of the Star Wars prequels are ten times better than the actual movies

The most surprising thing about being an adult is that someone can achieve a lot, have a lot of money and romantic/sexual partners…and still be a complete fucking loser!

It’d be really nice if TikTok pushed my content in the algorithm as much as they push my comments! 🙄

GOD DAMN IT KNEECAP ARE SO FUCKING GOOD!

Angry baby bunny with text that says Hatred. Malice even

“Sympathy Is a Knife” wasn’t even my favorite track on brat, but now I really like it ;)

Don’t know why people are shitting all over Taylor Swift’s new album. That’s just what her music sounds like.

The weird thing about Mike Johnson is that no matter what words he's saying, all I hear is "I'm a little bitch" over and over.

Cover image for Waffle Boys Jungle Adventure

This is the only waffle you should be posting about.

The lion does not concern himself with Ezra Klein or his headassery

GUY WHO JUST CAME BACK FROM DOING THE JABBA'S PALACE COMEDY FESTIVAL:

You know, I gotta say they're really great in there, they're just like us. I thought it was only gonna be women in chains and a trapdoor monster they feed slaves to but like, they also have a band that plays cool music.

Are there porn sites that have a special dick themed compilation series called “Cocktober” in October?

If not, they oughta try it. They’d make millions!

A light brown bunny with perked ears licks a glass window.

Jimi Hendrix, Saville Theatre, London, June 1967

Samson and I are watching Scooby and the gang. don’t text.