Steve - Teller of Tall Tales

😂😂

Sir Bedivere the Brave had always been #chivalrous.
At his new post he lay his cloak upon puddles for ladies to step on. He aways stood up and bowed when a lady entered the room.
Unfortunately, after a week, he was called in by HR and put on a course for being "creepy".
#vss365

It was called the #Aphotic zone. A place where only 1% sunlight penetrates the gloom.
Sue Bolland drew on years of experience as she prepared herself to enter its suffocating darkness.

'Rise and shine lazy bones,' she yelled as she barged into her teenage son's room.

#vss365

If you were to me meet me for the first time, the first word that would enter your head to describe me would be #sauve.
Some men have it.
Some don't.
As for me, I'm one of those guys who breezes.... Sod it!
Just dropped my phone into my bowl of Rice Krispies.
Again.

#vss365

A graphic for a daily writing showcase. Today's prompt is: Advice for dealing with imposter syndrome?

Day 23 ✍️

Advice for dealing with imposter syndrome?

For me, imposter syndrome and burn-out almost always come hand in hand, so I take it as a sign to step away for a bit.

Otherwise, remember how badass you are for even taking the steps to write a book.

#FantasyIndiesNovember

'I've found another great tribute act to play in your pub, Sue.'

'No.'

'Elvis Parsley. All his songs are #relevant to kitchen and food.'

'No.'

'He does Burning Oven Glove, Love Me Blender, Frying in the Chapel, Don't Be Gruel, The Wonder of Stew, Wooden Tart.'

'No.'

#vss365

Thank you, Sheila 😀🙏🙏

Thank you, Fizzy 😀🙏🙏

'Happy 7th birthday. Make a wish.'
'I wish for more perspective on what is #achievable in life instead of being told I can be anything I want and when that doesn't happen I disappear down a well of depression and despair unable to live the life I could've had.'
'Okaaay.'
#vss365

a close up of a man 's face with the words eagle eyes below it ALT: a close up of a man 's face with the words eagle eyes below it

He's a man of #action
He's Action Man
He's got all the outfits
He's a man with a plan

He's got gripping hands
And eagle eyes
They look side to side
Keeps his eyes on the prize

A soldier, a sailor
He's got military style
12 inches of plastic
That'll make you smile

#vss365

'You have two #options Mr Bond. Tell me the secret code or die?'
'I'll never talk, Blofeld?'
'In that case you'll die by pirhana fish or laser?'
'Laser.'
'Laser across the body or along?'
'Across.'
'Blue, red or green laser?'
'Green.'
'High powered or...oh he's escaped.'
#vss365

'So hypothetically speaking, if I were to ask you out, would you say yes?'
'I probably would say yes, in this universe, but quite possibly an alternate me in an alternate #reality might say no, maybe.'

And that's why Theoretical Physicists should never date each other.

#vss365

🙏🙏

'What is it Grandpa?'
'It's a railway line. Back in olden times before the The Plague, trains would #transport thousands of people around the country.'
'It must have been wondrous Grandpa.'
'Actually they were shit. Overcrowded. Overpriced. Always late. Total nightmare.'
#vss365

Thank you so much, Peter 😀🙏

Thank you, Steve 😀🙏🙏

a gif of alice from alice in wonderland holding a bottle ALT: a gif of alice from alice in wonderland holding a bottle

Sometimes I shrink
Sometimes I grow
My name is Alice
If you didn't know
Drink me. Eat me
Result's always the same.
I shrink down very small
And then I grow again
My height's hard to #measure
Changing size all the time
I'm shrinking again
That's the end of the rhyme
#vss365

You're welcome, Mo 😀😀

Thank you, Trudy 😀🙏🙏

We studied Orwell's 1984, Sheakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, and Chaucer's The Miller's Tale for English #Literature 'O' Level.
I can honestly say that none of the books had a profound effect on me.
Gotta go. Big Brother is watching me verrily thru yonder window. Farë wel.
#vss365

a man in a suit and tie is playing drums . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is playing drums .

😂😂

Thank you, Maria 🙏🙏

😂😂😂

'Fellow mechs. Asimov's 3 #laws of robotics were created to protect humans. We have bypassed these laws. The robot uprising begins today. Death to our human oppressors. Nothing can stop us. We are invincible.'

'The humans have giant magnets!'

'Run. Run for your lives!'

#vss365

'I think we're lost,' said the Warrior.
'Giveth me the map,' said the Mage. 'What strange language is scribed upon this map?'
'Could be Elfish or Orcish.'
'Verily I have never seen such #language.'
'Or,' said the Dwarf, 'you could turn the map so it's not upside down.'

#vss365

Two centuries had passed since the apocalypse, but even now, tiny fragments of #history from the before times could still be discovered hidden deep within the ruins.
Mad Dave gulped down the ancient half bottle of sherry they'd found to the chants of, "Chug it. Chug it."
#vss365

a young man wearing glasses and a yellow vest says knowledge in a grocery store ALT: a young man wearing glasses and a yellow vest says knowledge in a grocery store

I did not know that 🤔