Storm the Albatross

(( I think I'm getting the problem where mentions aren't showing up for me on this account, too. ))

(( Bsky why you gotta do this? I thought I was free of this buttcrap. ))

Oh okay. Lemme uh...

Lemme walk out real quick...den I walk back in and...

...

...

...

Sup?

Dis da part where I walk up to ya and say "sup" again?

... With a shake of his head, however, the albatross came to his senses and scurried back to his feet, wasting little time as he turned to face Sonic with his arm swung out wide, intent on clubbing them over the side of the head with a thick forearm.

... Storm was hefted up in the momentum and suplexed overhead, crashing back-first to the ground with a booming thud. The momentum of the throw lurched him into sitting up, briefly dazed as he slumped there with his arms in his lap and head slumped forward. ...

As his foe's arms extended out towards him, Storm would lunge out with his own to try and catch them. He'd soon find that as his hands clamped down on the werehog's wrists, the Babylonian was the one who was caught. Reeled in and forced to stumble the rest of the way towards his opponent, ...

... aiming to get his arms around the werehog and try to lift them straight off their feet.

"Heh, if I wasn't ready, den I wouldn'ta come here."

Hunching forward, the albatross readied his arms out at the sides, open palms aimed forward in a wrestler's stance. As soon as his foe braced themselves for battle as well, Storm would take off into a stampede of a charge, ...

The seabird let out a huff, hulking arms folding over his chest as his beak curved to a grin.

"Ain't dat da point? Wouldn't wanna waste my time fightin' anybody weaker den me."

Uncrossing his arms, Storm rolled his shoulders in the joints, tilting his head from side to side.

"So how 'bout it?"

"Huh."

"I had da feeling I was gonna be doin' dis."

*ahem*

[DRAMATIC POINTING}

"That."

"I wanna fight that."

(( Storm in the background, slackjawed and pointing like ))

(( "That" ))

(( "I wanna fight that." ))

'Sup?

[Too bad Storm's already asleep again.]

[Wonder what came over him?]

[Storm wakes up, eyes open wide and bloodshot]

FUCK THE HULK HOGAN JABRONI SON OF A BITCH I PUT HIM IN THE CAMEL CLUTCH BREAK HIS BACK BREAK HIS NECK FUCK HIS ASS MAKE HIM HUMBLE REINCARNATE AS A FLY SO YOU EAT MY SHIT YOU JABRONI SON OF BITCH FUCK THE HULK HOGAN AMEN

[Then he goes back to sleep]

And when dey do. I'm gonna come back and fight 'em even harder den dat!

It's lettin' yer opponents live dat lets ya figure out da most from 'em. Killin' someone 'cause yer afraid of their strength, dat's a waste.

[Finally, it seemed the seabird was getting his head on straight again as he shook his head in glum disagreement.]

It ain't like dat at all. Da fact dat I don't kill nobody, dat's what makes me stronger.

If I beat someone. I want dem ta be able to come back and fight even harder.

W-w-wuh-wait.

Dat's it? Dis was some kinda prank? You saw da Boss messin' wit me and you were tryin' onna dem dummy jokes like he does?!?

[Exhausted, or at least mentally so, the seabird starts rubbing his head.]

An' I thought I had ya figured out. I don't getcha at all.

I...

...

[Nope. He was still stumbling over his words. Storm had to pause a moment to catch up with his thoughts.]

I don't like how yer sayin' dat.

Reminds me of da boss when he tries ta say somethin' weird ta freak me out.

Are...are you tryin' ta do dat trick, too?

[Storm...poor Storm was still confused...hands pointing one way, then the other, getting crossed up.]

Wait but...what's dat gotta do with...

I mean earlier you said...

...

N-n-no! No! I ain't killin' nobody! Dere ain't nothin' bout killin' someone ta be proud of!

[Storm's stare went...absolutely blank. Wide-eyed. Bewildered.]

Wh...wh-what?

[He heard the words but...he sure didn't understand them. Or maybe he did and he just...didn't...at the same time?]

I...wh-what?

[No. He was dumbfounded. Completely dumbfounded. Not that anyone could blame even him.]

[Though the two clashed briefly in a shoving match of raw might, Storm would will himself to back down at the Zeti's demand, albeit slowly and cautiously.]

[Stepping away, the albatross glared back with equal parts ire and suspicion.]

Not here ta fight? Don't sound like you. What's dis about?

𝗞𝗻𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗘𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗱𝗻𝗮

"I know I talk a lotta smack 'bout da red mutt, but I got a lotta respect for 'em. I know 'bout da Echidnas an' their ancestors. I know they got pride for their strength."

"An' I know my own ancestors traded blows with his fer hundreds ah years."

"Dat's why I wanna beat 'em."

[... with intent to drill his shoulder into his foe's gut, then heft them off their feet and tackle them into the nearest wall.]

And after I fight 'em, I don't forget em!

[As soon as the Zeti's clawed hands grasped for his plumage, Storm's arms swung down like hammers, swatting away at his attacker's arms.]

I told ya before. I learn da most 'bout someone when I'm fightin' em.

[Bracing for a bull-like charge, the seabird ducked low, charging at Zavok ...]

You.

Whaddya want?

Gettin da strong urge ta fight myself again.

Heh...heheh...

Strong, like me.

(( I didn't forget about this. Promise. I'm just stirring up a little something to make it more than just "post a picture, say I wanna suplex them" ))

[Nope. That's it. Storm's heard enough. He promptly bends forward, then SLAMS his face into the ground so hard that he buries his head in the dirt like an ostrich.]

Boss.

I 'preciate dat an' all.

But if ya ever say any of 'dose words again and I gotta hear it. I might flatten yer skull like a melon.

....

[sigh]

Yes Boss, in a fight.

Why you gotta make everything weird all da time?