Dan

What if i see an orc and get horny? The risk is so great

Got invited to marathon lord of the rings this weekend but it'll be Ramadan.. .

I want to stop waking up now pls

AND IT WAS FUCKING HOLDEN FROM MINDHUNTERS LOL

Arin showed me and Jasper Hamilton last night and when the king came out i was like....i know this man intimately but i dont remember how

I almost ended up on the TIFU subreddit

May god never make me as horny as i was yesterday omg what even WAS that

I want tacos so bad..

a black and white cartoon of mickey mouse reading a book on how to kill . ALT: a black and white cartoon of mickey mouse reading a book on how to kill .

When the first thing the "no zoom" cartoon stream does is zoom

Was rewarded at the end with a weird ghost possession sex scene that lives in my head rent free

Thinking about that time I tried to frad Twilight in muddle school and got so bored that I just read The Lovely Bones instead

I will instead be focusing my energy on becoming elderly

im giving up on the idea of dating anyone. I think im just better off by myself and i just need to get comfortable with that.

Me when i remember people think im pretty:

Heaving and crying

Sylus:

The new Love and Deepspace banner video is so funny man im sorry

I can explicitly play with my boyfriend's butt on multiple separate occasions but GOD FORBID things get risque

I dont want to be selfish because i KNOWWWW its an international game so they have to keep it generally pretty tame but...let us be gooners.

My favorite part of the new love and deep space banner is when Xavier's chest jiggles and he's like "😏 did you like that??"

I just need something good to happen to me before i Lose It

I need the effects of getting laid without any of the conversation or human contact or

I can hear Tyson having a dream in the other room though lol

I want to sleep So Bad

What if i go to Canada and Tim Horton is just some guy

Who the hell asked "do it clap" on strawpage????????
😭

The answer is yes, but-

And my One Pair Of Jeans tore 😭

The regular sized shorts to panties pipeline :(

Im so mad bro just give me my money back at this point 😭

Me: excuse me, i can't eat cucumber and i asked for no pickles. This has pickles.

Manager: but this doesnt have any cucumbers

Me: pickles are made of cucumbers.

Manager: :O