Allie

Was having a Big Cry and looked out the window to see a mourning dove. I paused for a moment, they sung, and then I burst back in to tears because I love them

Mendel Weiznbachfeld knew what he was saying when he said “I have QUESTIONS…that should probably go unanswered. But they’re QUESTIONS…”

Dario VITALE 💜

Fuck this shit I’m just gonna pack up and move to Roku city 😞

Got beef w my therapist but unfortunately that’s part of his job and I will be seeing him again

once i remember why i walked into this room it's over for you all

GRRRAAAHHGGRRRRFGHRRRAAAAAAAH BARK BARK BARRRRKRRAAAAAAA

Left my wallet at work. Gotta plan a heist to get it today. This is gonna be risky (The building will be open)

God, take JoAnn's pain and give it to Hobby Lobby

One day. One day it will Hobby Lobby’s turn.

Sorry I can’t come in today. It’s To fukcin,, wimbdy

Yesterday was my Super Bowl (arriving in the big family groupchat to remind them I don’t tolerate racism and that casual jokes about it aren’t funny)

Not to be that person but what if I started frothing at the mouth and snarling

Area Woman did not get her wish :(

Area woman wishes upon a daytime star for it to be bucketing snow that sticks by the end of the next hour <3 (area woman does not want to go to work after therapy)

Say what you want about mice but those sumbitches can scurry

Can an evil wizard stop trying to control the world for 30 seconds so I can eat my lentil soup in peace

My husband and I always watch bachelorfantake’s recap videos after watching the bachelor and tonight he went to search for it and goes “what is his name…the scholar…”

Genuinely my favorite thing in Glee is Sue’s commitment to a tracksuit

Guys how did we get to a third paddington movie why can’t they just take him to daycare

One thing about me is that I will fight Nazis until I’m six feet in the ground.

To make things clear: I refuse to love anything silently anymore. I will scream and cry and praise the things I enjoy and I refuse to apologise for it

Sorry I’m busy all day, I have a phone call scheduled at 4pm.

i want to be exactly rich enough to buy a spacious, perfectly organized kitchen, where i’m not forced to stack all my pots and pans in a psychologically unmanageable way. and no richer

Whichever pronouns you want me to use are the ones I’m using for you

THE GUARDIAN: I knew one day I’d have to watch powerful men burn the world down – I just didn’t expect them to be such losers | Rebecca Shaw

One headline to rule them all

I feel like things are so surreally bad that my brain has given up trying to rationalize anything and all that’s left inside of me are shitposts