hailey

why am I watching DWTS for the first time ever rn (secret lives of morman wives has me in a fucking chokehold)

Zohran did a Charisma check and rolled a nat 20

congrats u just saved urself from a pound down

(this is a last call for Chase happy birthdays before I start burning down houses)

TELL CHASE HAPPY BIRTHDAY OR ELSE

WHO (taxonomists) GETS TO DECIDE (classify) WHAT A “TRUE” BUG (hemiptera) IS ANYWAYS?!

mantids are my favorite class of insects… & yes I have thought about this for years before so boldly sharing such a ~controversial~ opinion

big ups to the spineless democrats for my marketplace insurance premium going up over 5 times in cost next year 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

I know my psychiatrist didn’t just spend 30 minutes showing me SAD lamps on Amazon only to not increase my antidepressant for the winter……

told my 2 fifth grade students about everyone laughing when 67 got called at BINGO yesterday, and they looked at me in absolute disgust before one of them asked:

“how old was everyone…?”

anyone else start their day still hungover from Ryan’s wedding?

the TikTok gays death dropping to that military chant has been sending me for days

y’all ever get way too sad about the devastating—but necessary—growing pains that come with emerging adulthood & have no choice but to throw on an emotional support Hamilton rewatch?

if you start from the view that there's a policy compromise you can make that will calm people down, you can end up supporting some very authoritarian stuff very quickly

uk labour was elected 18 months ago on a pledge to make trans peoples lives easier, now they're implementing a bathroom ban

which is what many armchair generals, civility columnists, and stupid think tanks have urged dems to do

in labour, this tribe finally got full control of a pollical party & . . .

bsky.app/profile/polp...

i do genuinely wonder if reactionary cenrists ever get tired of never being right about anything

Of course, this is precisely why we expect law enforcement to wear badges and uniforms and show identification. Anyone could have foreseen (and many of us did) that this would be a serious side-effect of ICE's insistence on behaving like unaccountable thugs.

me begging for the “w/ hailey” tag to boost my stats knowing good & damn well I fell asleep halfway through the movie

hahahahhaha i’m locked in for over a year, they pay less than minimum wage, we get no checks if the gov is shut down, & they made me fill out a tax form to snatch a portion of the hypothetical checks back if they ever surpass $600 annually 🥰🥰🥰

never meet ur heroes…

finally have jury duty today dreams really do come true

i’m so sick of unmoving brows leading to unfeeling performances from overrated actors

girl wtf i’m also supposed to believe I don’t feel better after 36 hours on antibiotics & a full night of drinking…?

Conor & my couple costume next year
(he is the peewee doll & I am the peewee shoulder upon which he sits)

appaaaaarently ear infections don’t just go away if you ignore them for three weeks (womp)

“A tiger, an elephant, a giraffe…”

nothing like ripping the pen on the flooded mine

& to think Sabrina Carpenter music made me grateful to never date again……..

king said “never again…”

we should all be painting with our friends more

A door dash listing for SIDE MEAT

Hey girl, can I be your

i would die for u queen