OLD CRIED PANTS @captainfartpants

He is the 1st- infinity coming of QB Jeebus

07.10.2025 20:27 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

a cartoon drawing of a mariachi with a sombrero and mustache crying ALT: a cartoon drawing of a mariachi with a sombrero and mustache crying

07.10.2025 20:26 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

07.10.2025 05:45 — 👍 582 🔁 117 💬 59 📌 12

a cat is sitting in front of a window with a caption that says `` i live in constant agony '' ALT: a cat is sitting in front of a window with a caption that says `` i live in constant agony ''

07.10.2025 20:23 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Lots of flogging the bishop

07.10.2025 20:22 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

You could have followed after fucking but I know efficiency is key these days.

07.10.2025 20:20 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Get that burger bag, player

07.10.2025 20:19 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

How did you choose guitar over bongos?

07.10.2025 20:18 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

😒 hi Holly... 😄

07.10.2025 17:31 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

His idea of "them starting it " is that dems didn't let him steal the 2020 election. 🤡

07.10.2025 17:30 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

😒 hi Buzz... 😄

07.10.2025 17:28 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

But there's a 1 million dollar tariff.

07.10.2025 16:34 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

three south park characters are standing in front of a green truck with the words " i have no idea what 's going on " below them ALT: three south park characters are standing in front of a green truck with the words " i have no idea what 's going on " below them

07.10.2025 16:33 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Paid $787M for lying…

Don’t care

07.10.2025 12:09 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0

Is it enforceable?

06.10.2025 21:22 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Yes, and they are so generous and kind that they step aside each season to let others do the "playoff run" thing.

05.10.2025 21:47 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

. 5mg aprazolam and 2 tall draft beers at the airport bar- you'll travel smooth as hell

05.10.2025 21:43 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

a man is sweating while wearing headphones and says `` totally fine '' . ALT: a man is sweating while wearing headphones and says `` totally fine '' .

05.10.2025 21:42 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Aubrey clanked a PAT off the upright

05.10.2025 21:40 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

Of Aubrey made PAT

05.10.2025 21:25 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

I'm walking around sportin' Stein Mart on these Goodwill chumps.

05.10.2025 14:04 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

They have sunglasses 🤷‍♂️😎👎

05.10.2025 13:55 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

I haven't seen Seinfeld, sopranos, friends, or family guy. Good few of them I just see no possible appeal to me. I'm the founding member of MAT (men against titanic) where we never will watch it and I totally hate musicals passionately. I'm more or less a miserable type of person and loving it.

05.10.2025 13:54 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 3 📌 0

I made a whole giant foil roasting pan full of enchiladas and Shredded all the cheese... it sucked. I later remembered that the Cuisinart food processor has a shredding blade.

05.10.2025 13:38 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

People can't stand us richies, so we must label them all antifa and send them to Guatemalan concentration camps. I've come to this realization after taking in OVER 4 figs just this year alone.

05.10.2025 13:35 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

a man wearing sunglasses and a gold chain is smiling . ALT: a man wearing sunglasses and a gold chain is smiling .

05.10.2025 13:31 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

Organized religion is a scam at best and usually much worse.

05.10.2025 13:30 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

a little girl praying with her eyes closed ALT: a little girl praying with her eyes closed

05.10.2025 13:27 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Mark that under who gives a shit

05.10.2025 13:26 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

The guy from the ABBA song?

05.10.2025 13:24 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

OLD CRIED PANTS

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