Lou Inglese

Me, wearing my Alien:Earth Kirsh coplay with T. Ocellus (the eye-lien) taking a shoulder ride.

My T. Ocellus (the eye-lien) accessory. The tentacles are posable.

Finished my Kirsh in time for NY Comic Con tomorrow...
(I did give the wig a hacky haircut after this, but no time to reshoot) #AlienEarth

They are telling us they are going to use the military to kill US citizens, on US soil, on their enemies list with impunity. No judge, no jury, just executioner.

Donald J. Trump Chicago Mayor should be in jail for failing to protect Ice Officers! Governor Pritzker also! 263 ReTruths 864 Likes Oct 08, 2020, 8:19AM

Trump has lost his flipping mind.

Tump has deployed troops to Chicago over the objections of the city's mayor and state's governor, and is now saying they should both be "in jail."

Are we done with this tyrant yet? #NoKings #25A

The deepest circle of hell is reserved for people who put you on speakerphone in a crowded room and don't tell you.

"I don't need to see your ID"
Listen, you're going to look at this ID, squint hard, then look at me and back at the ID or we're going to have a problem, OK?

Sure God has the perfect plan but if you slip him a few prayers maybe he'll find an even more perfect plan, if you catch my drift.

It's a pretty big deal that the NYC Bar Association--one of the most prominent and respected bar associations in the country--is accusing the President of ordering the "unlawful summary execution," i.e. murder--of civilians in violation of US and international law. www.nycbar.org/press-releas...

The Trump cake is cut to reveal worms, insects and assorted vermin inside.

After they've cut it...

I got a Restraining Order and now I have to stay at least 50ft away from myself at all times.

"You make me feel stupid"
Thanks, but I can't take credit for something you've obviously worked so hard at.

Sun-kissed ass plug
Self-tanning enthusiast
An enraged, bewigged fetus blown up to nightmarish size
Parental pile of burnt organic material
Human-shaped wad of Gak
Walking irradiated tumor

Cryogenically frozen bog man
A glistening, shouting gristle mass with a history of saying terrible and stupid things
Screaming giant cheese wedge
Republican frontrunner and 250-pound accumulation of rancid beef
Day-Glo roadside billboard about jock itch
Temperamental gelatinous sponge

First hobgoblin to enter the White House
A pair of chapped lips superglued to a hairball
Horsehair mattress stuffed with molding copies of Hustler
Malignant corn chip
Human Kinder Egg whose inner surprise is a tiny pebble of rat shit
A man with the hair of a radioactive skunk
Roiling Cheez Whiz mass

Heaving carcass
Stately hot dog casing
Flatulent leather couch
Swollen earthworm gizzard
Narcissistic bowl of rotten gazpacho
Yellowing hunk of masticated gristle
A human/Komodo dragon hybrid
Blackening scab artfully hiding in your Raisin Bran

Oversized wasp exoskeleton stuffed with old mustard
Neo-fascist real estate golem
Abandoned roadside ham hock
Bewildered, golden-helmeted astronaut who's just landed on this planet from a distant galaxy
Monument to human hubris crafted out of rotting Spam
A walking pile of reanimated roadkill

A baby sitting in a diaper full of his own shit
The angry orange
Fascist Kumquat
Seagull dipped in tikka masala
Bursting landfill of municipal solid waste
Mountain of rotting whale blubber
Sputum-filled Orange Julius
Gangrenous gaping wound
Racist, sexist block of aged Cheddar

Tyrant idolizer and drug lord pal
Drunk court jester who's been roving the country doing racist Chris Farley impersonations
Short-fingered vulgarian
Failed mail-order meat salesman
Fossilized meatball
Clump of mashed-up candy corn
Sentient wig possessed by an ancient evil

Chester Cheetah impersonator
Lumbering human-like tardigrade
A tiny piece of dried cat poop that you found in your rug
Three month old rotting jack o'lantern
Animated circus peanut saturated with fascism instead of corn syrup and gelatin
Tyrant idolizer and drug lord pal

A dishrag that on closer inspection is alive with maggots
Lead paint factory explosion
Candied yam riddled with moldy spider carcasses
Enraged Gak spill
The shriveled pinto bean you had to pluck out of your Chipotle burrito basket
Human-sized infectious microbe
Poorly-trained circus orangutan

Dusty barrel of fermented peepee
Usually reasonable burlap sack full of rancid Peeps
Degloved zoo penis
Presidential candidate and bargain bin full of yellowing Jean-Claude Van Damme movies
Hairpiece come to life
Decomposing pumpkin pie inhabited by vicious albino squirrels

A brightly burning trash fire
Impoverished urchin
Aggressively stupid
Great judgment-haver
Man-sized sebaceous cyst
Enlarged pee-splattered Sno Cone
Empty popcorn bag rotting in the sun
Man-shaped asbestos insulation board
Hair plug swollen with rancid egg whites
Inside-out lower intestine

A rich idiot ... willing to allow garbage to fall out of his mouth without batting a single golden lash
Noted troll
The class clown that everyone wishes would be quiet and let the class learn
Melting businessman
Wax museum figure on a very hot day
Soggy burlap sack
Bag of toxic sludge

Melting pig carcass
Disgraced racist
Talking comb-over
Human equivalent of cargo pants that zip away into shorts
Cheeto-dusted bloviator
Fuzzy meat wad
Bag of flour
Human turd
Not in any way sexist, you bimbos
A man who cherishes women
Decomposing ear of corn
His own best parody

Found an old list of nicknames (for who I can't remember). They all seem too charitable now:
A rotting, sentient pan of sweet potato
Orange asshat
Four-time bankruptcy filer and seething hernia mass
Bone-in ham
Sun-dried tomato
Adult blobfish
Deflated football
Fart-infused lump of raw meat

history teacher in 50 years: So in September, that’s when the president signed an executive order criminalizing anti-fascism and saying all resistance would be crushed

student: oh so that’s when the whole country realized they were living under fascism

teacher: haha what? oh no lol not at all. no.

Can Miller really believe this? If so, he is delusional. If not, then he’s a reprehensible demagogue.

The great thing about social media is that you can remind yourself how terrible humanity is without leaving your house.

I tried to find my inner peace, but I couldn't locate it through all the artillery fire.

Streaming service need a block button so I can stop them from pushing the same crap at me over and over while I try to browse.

[Scene is ANCIENT GREECE - where SOCRATES and PLATO and others are sitting round, thinking] 1 SOCRATES: Plato.. PLATO: Yes Socrates? 2 SOCRATES: Can you tell me, are you human? PLATO: Why… yes, Socrates 3 SOCRATES: And would you agree, Plato, that a human knows what a chariot is? PLATO: Um, yep 4 SOCRATES: So you can tell me, then 5 [Socrates produces a papyrus, showing a drawing of the corner of a chariot wheel] SOCRATES: *Is that a chariot*? 6 PLATO: Well that’s more just a bit of wheel 7 SOCRATES: So not a *chariot*. PLATO: No. 8 SOCRATES: [Producing another papyrus with the full drawing of the chariot, chopped into boxes] So if a man were challenged to “tap the boxes containing chariots to prove you’re human” when he was just trying to check his ClubCard points... *where could he tap*? 9 PLATO: Well you can’t tap any of them really 10 SOCRATES: So are we not human? PLATO: ‘Spose not. 11 [Bleak pause] 12 PLATO: I’ll get the hemlock SOCRATES: Yeah [ends]