Carmy

if the harp doesn’t play when i die then ill know something is very wrong

It would be terribly inconvenient for a zombie apocolypse to start right now..

I'm not a alcohol connoisseur I'm an alcohol consumer

these two dumbass’s I’m with don’t know I just shit myself and smeared it all over my buttcocks #woke

Ripping myself a new a**hole so i can #fitmore

TLT

I love you Will Toledo

I cant stop watching magic tricks

Why does 2 minutes go by faster than 1 minute?

#carmelitacore

you hit the woah so viscerally bro

Calling my hoes intrusive thots cause theyre obsessed with my freaking head

who up tuppering they wares right now

hell is gonna be so on fleek

Im thinking on it !!!

no for sure yeah uh yeah dude i mean cmon like obviously yeah

i’m tired of being part of the problem i want to be the whole problem

Fucking titties w a strap-on, like basket weaving underwater
(Thank you randi from red rock for this one)

No i am not a furry. Im dressed like this because i want to be #putdown

got my dissociates degree

bouncing on it like the dvd logo (aimless technique, never satisfying, avoiding corners, etc.)

Wheres the apology video..? D:

They say jesus was carpenter... but hows hes always giving me this hardwood..??

Jesus keeps turning my wap into wine so they're sending me to rehab

Witzz deez nuts...