Tristan Jakob-Hoff

"I'm fairly certain I didn't fall asleep during Bi Gan's hypnotic new anthology film RESURRECTION, and yet when I think back on it the morning after I feel like I may have imagined the whole thing."

Read more on my Substack: dimlylitrooms.substack.com/p/resurrection

Exit 8 (Game + Film Review) Hallway to Hell

"[EXIT 8 is] like watching a Twitch stream with an added dash of dramatic irony."

My first London Film Festival review of the year is live on my Substack, and I'd love for you to read it. (You get a bonus game review too!)

#Exit8 #LFF2025 #LondonFilmFestival #FilmReview

One Battle After Another Paul Thomas Anderson has accidentally made the film we all need right now

My review of ONE BATTLE AFTER ANOTHER.

I would posit that while it is true that you cannot queue by myself, you nevertheless can queue towards the fridge by yourself. I'm not sure why this feels true but it does, and in this day and age, that's enough for me to slap a great big QED on it.

Haha wonderful!

I do prefer my hunks of meat to be unidentifiable as actual body parts, particularly ones I might care to boop.

Also a gut punch: the other three episodes.

I'm not going to lie, I did not make this connection.

Explains how he's seen 4,000 shows.

I think I just found Koki's Hinge profile.

It is very, very on top.

One of the most quietly devastating films I've seen. And I watch a lot of quietly devastating films.

Not entirely sure what the first one is but I WANT ONE.

Imagine coming to ANY job interview this unprepared and being basically certain you'll get it anyway.

A ★★★★ review of Bird (2024) BIRD is a welcome return to the sort of film that Andrea Arnold first made her name with. In the last decade-and-a-half she has given us a period drama (WUTHERING HEIGHTS), a US road movie (AMERICAN H...

Yes. It doesn't feel self-parodic at all, in fact it feels like she has found a really interesting (and productive) new angle of approach.

My write-up here: boxd.it/7CL4Jh

Lots of people go on holiday and leave their pet(s) in the care of a third-party who visits but doesn't live at their home.

I was at that Lachenmann concert too!

I think the Golden Rule is if anyone in the audience laughs even once it's a musical.

LimeWire Wrapped 1. sistem_of_a_dowm_Zelda_song.flac 2. Nirvana - Glycerine.flv 3. track_8_(1)_(1)c.mp3 4. weird_al_Bert_and_Big_Bird_smoking_weed_FUNNY(parody).wav 5. jay-z_the-blueprint_FULL ALBUM_REAL.mp3.exe

finally finished downloading my limewire wrapped after 20 years

The .mp3.exe cracked me up.

Gregg Wallace's new PR person announced.

Ohhh and I thought I was the only one.

But that has the unfortunate effect of reminding me how old I am.

At this point "I Dimly Recall What You Did Last Summer" might be more appropriate.

I don't know, I would quite like to see Coralie Fargeat's REVENGE (2017) enacted as national policy.

I like the sounds of this. But speaking of films where it's best to go in knowing nothing, it's a shame you never got to review STRANGE DARLING because I really think a) you would have loved it and b) it could have used the boost.

Remembering that time I seamlessly strung together Harry Partch, Paula Temple, Bohren & Der Club Of Gore, Rødhåd and Alfred Schnittke.

I would make a great music editor and the world's worst fucking DJ.

"I'm Stanley Kubrick directing Spartacus."

"No, I'm Stanley Kubrick directing Spartacus!"

Speaking of gochujang and tofu, here's my take on Korean Fried Tofu, which was tonight's dinner.