A Man Called Keith

This! This is the review I needed: my work people were all entranced by it and I was starting to wonder if I was wrong...

He sits in a radio studio and angry Welsh pensioners phone him up for a good old rant.

Work chums spent time this morning telling me that Les Mis was some incredible, unmissable film. I dunno, I don't like many musicals.

That's fair: most versions of the Ford Escort were pretty shit.

That's life advice, that is: don't be a cold-calling spam lord.

Among many other things, I am the keeper of the phone system at work. I take huge delight in pulling the numbers of cold-calling spam lords that have wasted my or my workchums' time from the call logs and blocking them hard. Petty but rewarding.

Today a customer asked for something that may be technically impossible or if not impossible certainly proper spenny.

A normal day for the Engineering department, in other words.

The same happened to me when I found that *my* favourite big spoon in the office kitchen cutlery drawer was also somebody else's favourite big spoon in the office kitchen cutlery drawer. Whore big spoon.

I fell in love once. She left and broke my heart, but it was great for a while.

The general availability of mince pies is the only aspect of the festive season starting in September that does not piss me off.

Yes, inny, outty from front to back, and also in the uppy, downy sense, too.

It's the jelly in either that I find difficult to deal with, the jarring difference in textures.

I appreciate that it might avoid a problem one day, it was just that I felt the need for soothing words afterwards...

The only time I've grown much facial hair at all was when I was in intensive care - first thing I asked my family to send in when I was awake was an electric shaver.

I once had an ex that liked me to let things get stubbly at the weekends I was with her.

Lacquered at first sight - when you have to be drunk to meet someone.

I certainly don't think it needs curryfying. I can see a place in the world of fusion food for a Chicken Dhansak Lasagna maybe, but not that.

Shepherd's pie person is gonna be *pissed*

And yes, I had very little sleep last night and had a little cocktail #cans with dinner.

No not for that reason - I just slept badly.

Yes I do say thank you to the Google lady.

That feeling when your car thinks you're not braking hard enough and warns you that you're about to crash and spoil its pretty face but you know its braking abilities better than it does and then you give it some calming words in your calming manager voice.

Tarot cards, but for office interactions.

What can I say: I'm an enabler 🙂

An excellent plan!

He looks like he's auditioning for the part of Marley and / or Marley in A Christmas Carol.

Peterborough Telegraph: Drug dealer was found with cocaine and heron hidden in his pants.

He’s gonna do (oh-ho!) BIRD!!!!

So the French prime minister has done a big old Truss? (Except for the shaking germ-covered hands with Queenie part)

Big flashback to the medication induced hallucinations from my intensive care stay today. It's been 4 1/2 years but that crap is still trying to escape from the storage room in my brainz.

At least it was the cool one in which the lady I was sort of dating turned out to be a secret agent and I was Q

Under certain conditions the rapid expansion of high pressure Hydrogen can cause its temperature to *rise* to the point that it will self-ignite.

Mini pizza, creme brulé, cider, maybe a few lebkuchen.

Another day, another pivot table.

No, really, I quite like Excel.