Patrick Swayne

Someone even managed to grab a snap of me chowing down on shawarma in my pants full gremlin style

Hag Do vibes were immaculate in Barcelona 🇪🇸 roll on the wedding trip to Colombia 🇨🇴

The concept of going on Dragon’s Den and pitching them on a day between Sunday and Monday

It’s lead poisoning, case closed

As per Friday’s Emmerdale, a large glass of wine costs, at most, £5 in The Woolpack. Booking a one way flight to Yorkshire IMMEDIATELY.

Oh the hype is REAL real. Banger of a film! The comparisons some have made to From Dusk Till Dawn really don’t do it justice - it has much more humanity and is more interested in the spiritual connection of music & life. But when it springs into violence it doesn’t disappoint #Sinners

Suspended for 12 hours on twitter because I posted this video… what happened to comedy being legal on X dot com

Only had two beers and two wines last night and I feel like I’ve been run over by a truck. What is the scientific explanation for this.

Incredibly late to the party on this but working from a coffee shop for a couple hours is actually decent? At least here in DK. It’s not hectic, iced chai lattes are banging, they have better carrot cake than I could manage at home… I see why people do it

Just got to the Yellowjackets episode where Hilary Swank turns up in that ridiculous baseball cap (wild Friday night I know). Deeply unserious storylines this season, if you can even call them that!

We are 13 MINUTES IN to the latest episode of Grey’s Anatomy and they are still rolling the credits onscreen, this show basically employees half of Hollywood the industry will have to file for bankruptcy if it’s ever cancelled

Rediscovered this album thanks to Kelly Clarkson and had a full-body flashback to listening to this endlessly for like three weeks straight when I was in Year 9

Busy day

Tried some German gin last night.

Shan’t be doing that again.

Next time I make garlic chilli shrimp pasta it might help if I add the garlic and chilli to the pan 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️

I am so outrageously hungover today

The Great British railway infrastructure today:

Bastille are touring the UK again in November and I WILL be flying back for it, fingers crossed another airline steps in to take over the Ryanair routes as I don’t fancy paying an extra £200 on top for the BA option 😬

I’m gonna need Yellowjackets to find a narrative, *any* narrative, at some point soon; in both timelines but especially the present day ones. The actors are all brilliant but this isn’t a hangout sitcom!

I think they might have actually departed Hawk Tuah to El Salvador

Decided my next rewatch will be The Sopranos, truly one of the best and it’s insane how much rizz this man had

Finally finished The X-Files - man those bonus seasons were more of a slog than I remembered, but it was a joy to have Mulder & Scully back together, and there were a couple of decent case-of-the-weeks among the lamentable alien conspiracy storylines (why did they even bother with that part)

Update your dictionaries then @nytimes.com

25-2-9 =14
14 x 50 =700
700 - 1 =699

Mayhem is thrilling, from start to finish. Zombieboy an instant standout for me but it’s a skipless album. Even Die With A Smile takes on a new life powered by the vibes throughout. Perfect way to kick off my 40s tbh 🥳

My godson is obsessed with me, and I love it

Arrived in Bournemouth, did a quick grocery shop for breakfasts and snacks in the Airbnb, straight into town to find an outfit for Saturday and get some gifts for the girls organising my party. Managed to get everything i needed in two shops, so I’m rewarding myself with - you guess it - a pint

Back in Blighty for the long birthday weekend, pit stop in London tonight then travelling back to Bournemouth tomorrow - so obviously I’ve checked in and immediately decamped to the bar for some alcohol and a bit of time with the Tucc’

Conclave mention on paragraph one, chapter one