The Valley Butcher

lol it’s this guy

Never seen Lebowski, Shawshank, or a Terminator.

Interesting. The obvious assumption is that you’d be a huge Top Chef fan.

Damn, man. I’m sorry to hear this. Sending you good thoughts that the tests turn out ok.

this is why he’s not afraid of lightning

Will be emailing the NFL today to see if they will have their own security to prevent Super Bowl fans from being attacked by ICE.

Medi-WHAT lady?

Well, everything is happening out there a lot more than we think it is.

He’ll be DJ-ing the first party in dickhead’s new ballroom.

Generally not a fan of hot salsa, but I’d try it.

As you navigate your day today, please remember that Republicans have control of all 3 branches of government. 💫

a person wearing a mask is laying in a hammock . ALT: a person wearing a mask is laying in a hammock .

Happy October, y’all!

oprah winfrey is holding a microphone and saying you get a trophy and you get a trophy ALT: oprah winfrey is holding a microphone and saying you get a trophy and you get a trophy

Soldiers these days. Everybody gets to be a general.

Never let it be said that I questioned Craig Counsell.

Not on board with Counsell taking out Boyd this early.

I mean yes this is funny, but the fact that these unconstitutional stormtroopers are so directionless that they literally stand around waiting for random nonwhite delivery guys to bike past them is just pathetic. No mandate, no mission, no clue. Just racism.

Ben Johnson post-game and game balls

Zoom in on the lower left of the banner.

The only dream of the 90’s they must be aware of is from Rage Against the Machine

Tamsyn Muir Gideon the Ninth “Lesbian necromancers explore a haunted gothic palace in space!” - Charles Stross

The blurb on this book sounds like it should win Keyword Bingo.

I miss hearing evenflow on a regular basis

There’s gotta be a betting market somewhere that you can get odds on the number of top men who will punch little Petey in the face because he tried to talk down to them about what it means to be a warrior.

How it started / How it's going

I’ve gotten requests for free work “for exposure” my whole life, once from a literal billionaire. Luckily less so in recent decades.

But using the “for exposure” excuse with TAYLOR SWIFT? Truly warped. There’s a whole class of business shitheads who really think no artist *deserves* to be paid.

"Additionally, we will be charging a 30% Tariff on Upholstered Furniture"

I bet you could even do it for less than 2 mil. And without the 🎱

I have a great idea for a tv show about Jesus as a Quarterback

Dave Matthews has the opportunity to do the funniest thing.

🚨💔🚨 Nothing about this makes anything about this country decent, trustworthy, or honorable. This is depraved. 1/2