Graham

As someone that works in IT, these global single points of failure are great. It used to be that people would scream at me and my colleagues when these services that we managed internally broke while we were desperately trying to fix them. Now we just point at the news and shrug, and get no grief.

If you're accepting late entries, I'll chuck in Bjorkie and Simon Le Bon Bon

"I forgot to add yeast to my bread mix using a Panasonic bread machine and it's now finished baking. Is there a way to fix it?"

"Measure out a new batch.
𝐀𝐝𝐝 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞"

EXCUSE ME - DID I LOG INTO SassGPT BY MISTAKE?

Exactly. If you just took the subset of "My 5 favourite films", you could rank them from best to worst, but all of them would presumably still be 5 out of 5 on a rating scale in your eyes. Each is taken on its own merits in a rating scale - not relative to the others.

They'll remove one letter from the start of the name after each collapse and will just be called "Y" by the middle of next year.

Indeed. "Musk bought Twitter to win the election" has always struck me as retrofitted to the facts too. He was literally forced to do it after trying to back out. That doesn't strike me as someone with a grand plan for it.

I write code, and it's clearly a gamechanger here. However, it does do things in a way that will store up big future problems if you're not checking its work. I don't envy businesses deciding when to let trainees use it. If you've never learnt the right way, you're not going to catch the wrong way.

I finished this just yesterday and can verify these claims

I read earlier that most of the high profile advertisers that left the platform are now back again, Apple included. Given the reasons they gave for leaving originally are even more acute now, you have to assume they've decided they might end up in the firing line if they continue to stay away.

I've already started noticing this when coding, although at least I know when it's getting it wrong (for now). The bigger worry is the generations coming in after me that won't have those skills in the first place. How do you know where it's going wrong if you don't know what right looks like?

The funny thing in this case is it's specifically because they tried to make it difficult for China to steal their idea by hiking the price of the chips to them that China had to innovate and come up with something better

What's Scrooge McDuck up to these days? Can't be any worse.

This was the working title for "I Wish it Could be Christmas Everyday"

I saw the title of today's News Agents was "Why have conspiracy theorists become suspicious of milk?" and my very first thought was "Yeah... I really don't miss Twitter"

I'd have thought if you don't get on with your kids, you probably won't worry too much what percentage of their inheritance will be taxed.

We'll know it's complete when Stephen Fry is finally dislodged from the lift

Admittedly, I sometimes have to do 3 passes of the aisle to secretly grab them avoiding the gaze of the people I'm fairly certain just wait there to tut at anyone picking them up. Self service checkouts are a furtive early mince pie eater's best friend.

Amateur! If you're not eating your first one on a roasting day in September, you're not doing it properly.

"I've promised to get rid of the all the bots, but that's like finding a needle in a haystack. Wait... I've got it! Get rid of the hay - then it'll be easy to find them!"

Only a few months until he gets to explain a trolley is what they call a cart

A box of assorted lightbulbs

Just found an old box full of my greatest ideas. Really wishing I'd labelled them now, though.

Maybe this was Musk's endgame. Improve worker productivity by destroying Twitter from the inside. Conspiring with Zuckerberg to make the obvious replacement so insipid that working is preferable. Distraction always finds a way though.

I do like Ocado's "How about these things" final push before confirming your order.
Most supermarkets "Do you want some Haribo? You do don't you? You filthy pleb"
Ocado: "Fancy some octopus tentacles?"

Always on their terms as well. They never ask what their policies are on pensions or farming or AI.

A screenshot from the Sainsburys website of Yorkshire Provender soup. The flavour is listed as "Chicken & Lentil Soup with Spinach & Cum..."

I think I'll stick with tomato if it's all the same

I did the same, and discovered in the process that the neighbours no longer automatically assume I'm right and follow my lead like they used to. This is going to take some time to get over.

A fun fair entrance booth sitting on its own in an empty car park

Somewhere in the country, there's a fun fair with no way to get in.

The relentless march of time...

Old guy in Sainsburys went up to a staff member to ask if they had any DVDs. The presumably recent recruit had a look on their face that suggested they were trying to work out if that was a fruit or a vegetable.