CMonkey

@erikaishii.bsky.social who do we need to pay to keep a camera on your #thegameawards reactions?

ONE OF THEM JUST RAN INTO THE WALL I STG

Happy monday night to everyone except the cats in my house who decided now is the time for zoomin'.

Judge: if you don't have your (jury summons) card, please join the line at the right, *Indicates very long queue* and have out your ID.
White man: *approaches the bench with his ID*
Judge: ...

I also dont know why I'm surprised there are so many people here, but there are SO MANY PEOPLE here

One, I've already made a mistake. Apparently you can bring food?
And laptops?
I assumed this was state testing rules: only books and water allowed

I turn 37 in approximately 20 days, and just received my first jury summons.
Join me on my journey in 'Observations from a County Court'.

With coral-rich Churna Island now an MPA, Pakistan takes baby steps on ocean protection KARACHI — From the sands of Manjhaar Beach on the far outskirts of Karachi, Pakistan, an island is just visible 10 kilometers, about 6 miles, offshore. Mist rising from the Arabian Sea often shrouds…

Pakistan has just set aside 98 km² of sea around Churna Island as a no-take marine reserve. The new rule protects Pakistan’s most pristine coral reef system from trawlers and oil spills and nudges the nation closer to the global goal of safeguarding 30% of oceans. buff.ly/0K9gW06
#ShareGoodNewsToo

People at my job who are good humans:
The admin assistant, who i just saw in the bathroom at the automated paper towel dispenser, getting a stack of paper towels to take to the coffee area, because that automated dispenser is empty and also broken

🚨Out now on @Dropout.tv: the newest episode of Game Changer brings aboard Mike Trapp, Rekha Shankar, and Jordan Myrick as new producers

🫵 and YOU are going to help decide the winner! 🏆

Just keep an eye on what gets posted to this account in the next hour... 👀

#GameChanger

a man with a mustache is sitting in front of a group of people with the word surprise . ALT: a man with a mustache is sitting in front of a group of people with the word surprise .

sam: everyone watch as soon to premiere as possible!
@gamechangershow.bsky.social at premiere time: *crashes*

🚨TONIGHT!

🫨A very special episode of Game Changer launches on @dropout.tv at 7pm ET / 4pm PT (and we recommend you tune in immediately)

✨Starring host Sam Reich, and guests Mike Trapp, Rekha Shankar, and Jordan Myrick...and a few others 😉

#GameChanger

The car parked next to me at Sonic got their order, and then immediately left and got in line at the Braum's next door.

I'm perplexed, but mostly I just want to know which stop was for ice cream, and which stop was for hamburgers.

That any of us have to care about the messy breakup of these two massive narcissists — and that they both individually wield such massive power — is an indictment of our political system and further proves the poisonous influence of Big Money on our democracy.

Just drove past a private security vehicle whose motto was proudly emblazoned:
' protecting the best of humanity from the worst of it" 🙄🤮

My God is anti-capitalism And sent a train to keep me from going to work. I'm pretty sure.

Theology is so interesting, because if you believe in a loving God, why on Earth would you ever believe that a train on your way to work is punishment for not having left earlier, as opposed to a sign that you should have just stayed home?

I love this app most of the time but every time there is violence against Jews in the United States there are two options: say nothing or disable interactions

it’s pretty bleak

Why I’m Resigning from the NSF and Library of Congress I cannot participate in systems that require dishonesty as the price of belonging.

"For me, the answer now lies in refusal, the withdrawal of participation from systems that require dishonesty as the price of belonging."

Today I am resigning from the National Science Board and the Library of Congress Scholars Council.

I wrote about my decision in TIME.

time.com/7285045/resi...

Me, looking at a very bleu piece of bleu cheese: OH MY GOD, IS MY CHEESE MOLDY?!

I did not consent to be isekaied into an Onion article

Unrelated, how can I convince my tv apps to stop recommending me Paw Patrol?

Against me, specifically.

@paramountplusbr.bsky.social getting ready to remove the Dora the Explorer movie is a hate crime.

Pokémon Go to the polls

It was a half a pint of milk, a dozen eggs, and an onion.

Happy Monday to everyone except the doordasher who complained that my order was too heavy, after I had to meet her outside in order to prove that she was in fact in the right apartment complex.

old Soviet joke for our times:

Guy stops by the newsstand every day, scans the front page, doesn’t buy the paper. One day the vendor asks what he’s up to.

Guy says: “looking for an obituary.”

Vendor says “those are towards the back of the paper, comrade.”

Guy says: “not the one I’m looking for.”

Happy Monday to everyone except the people watching loud videos without headphones in public places

The restaurant I ordered delivery from stapled THROUGH my straw to the bag.

War Crime.