Greg Kilpatrick, CST, LMFT

You’re not betraying the revolution if you want to be ruined.
You don’t owe the world a TED Talk on your kinks.
If it’s consensual and it still feels good even as the scene fades, it belongs.

It’s not love if it disappears the moment you set a boundary.
Big words. Big gestures. No follow-through.
Therapy teaches you to stop calling crumbs a feast.

What if instead of increasing tolerance of these hard parts of self, we worked to integrate them more thoughtfully in the FULL self?

Wholistic health comes from integration of selves not the extinction of them.

Historically one of the primary goals of psychotherapy has been to increase tolerance of intolerable emotions. This viewpoint was delightfully challenged by @xtaffi.bsky.social at the annual @aasect.bsky.social conference this summer. 🧵

What if instead of increasing tolerance of negative affect, we worked to integrate parts of self?

What if the parts of us that are scared, angry, anxious, depressed, etc yearn for deeper connection to us? Not less?

Wholistic health comes from integration of selves not the extinction of them.

ICE is hiring! US immigration and Customs Enforcement is looking for highly motivated, morally indifferent individuals to join our team. Open positions include: Senior Goon Racism Enforcement Office Unmarked Van Driver (Part-Time) Experience with children a plus usajobs.gov

From this month's edition of The Onion.

I think we often times neglect erotic mindsets. We think about having sex, but we don’t think about thinking or feeling about sex.

Americans are relearning the lesson we learned during the Gilded Age of the late 1890s, when robber barons ran the government and the economy for their own benefit: Oligarchy is incompatible with the common good.

I'm hopeful we'll respond with a new progressive movement.

When obedience was holiness, submission became survival.
If you crave control now, you’re not twisted—you’re integrating.
Desire has a way of redeeming what dogma tried to bury.

People often come to me asking how to have more sex. The question I often have in return is “How can we help your mind wander more erratically?”

Curiosity and fantasy fuel good sex

When are we going to kill the myth that porn causes erectile dysfunction?

So many of the same systems that created overbearing religious systems also created overbearing psychotherapeutic systems.

Especially for those of us who have experienced religious trauma, it’s really important to find a therapist who does not demand us to think in particular ways.

I'm never get over the fact that this administration's war on trans people is being carried out with the pretext of "protecting women and girls" while the president is a pedophile rapist.

Are We Witnessing a Marriage Comeback? The institution has adapted, and is showing new signs of resilience.

Marriage is showing new signs of resilience, Brad Wilcox writes. The institution has adapted—and continues to survive.

This is one of the things that I really highlight in my therapeutic work with relationships. YOU are allowed to decide with your partner(s) what your relationship looks like. This type of tailor-made relationship style will rescue marriage as an institution (and make it a hell lot more accessible)

This would be comically ironic if it weren’t chilling.

Some couples do brunch. Others negotiate power dynamics.
One isn’t deeper than the other.
Cuffs can mean “I trust you.” Protocol can mean “I see you.”
Let’s stop pretending only softness counts as care.

Ugly moans. Awkward silence. That one time you cried halfway through?
Still valid. Still erotic. Still hot.
Pleasure and connection do not come from polish (unless maybe it's "polishing"), it comes from presence and embodiment.

Command doesn’t always come from confidence.
Sometimes it’s panic in a bright neoprene harness.
Do you run the scene to avoid being caught off guard? To feel safe?
Let’s talk about what you’re protecting underneath all that control.

BlueSky, have we met?! Hello!👋🏼 I’m Michelle, your friendly neighborhood soft place to land. I work with all sorts of folks but many tend to be working through some sort of difficult experience or relationship trends. Learn more about my work at HumanConnectionLab.com 💜

If you are conditioned to think sex had to be wild to count, then tenderness can be revolutionary.
You don’t need to impress anyone with how loud, rough, or kink-literate you are.
Bring yourseld and be present in your body. That’s the main act.

That “too much” feeling? That might just be your body finally exhaling.
“Clingy” is what people call it when you’ve never had safe attachment modeled.
But needing someone isn’t the problem. Never being held without consequence is.
Therapy can help you determine tell the difference.

Kinks don't need to send a message or teach a lesson. Sometimes, we enjoy them simply because they're exciting and arouse us. That's perfectly okay. #KinkAcceptance #JustForFun

Thinking about this today:

Sex dosent start at desire, but rather at an openness to feeling desire.

That’s where to start.

What does it feel like to give your body and mind permission to get turned on?

Healing is an ongoing journey. Waiting for perfection before accepting love might mean missing out on the love that really brings you alive. The key isn't completing the process but finding someone(s) who can walk with you through it.

#LoveHeals #JourneyTogether

You’re not your fantasies, even though they’re an important part of who you are.

You’re also not bad because your fantasies are violent, submissive, messy, or would be morally ambivalent questionable if they played out IRL.

We don’t choose what turns us on. But we can choose how we engage with it.

Why former ‘MAGA junkie’ regrets voting for Trump | CNN Politics CNN’s Randi Kaye speaks with West Virginia voters, some of whom are former supporters of President Donald Trump, who now regret their vote after losing their jobs due to DOGE cuts in the federal gover...

Stories like this one tells me that a lot of his most ardent supporters were okay with the abuse they knew he was bringing…they just never thought it would be aimed at people like them.

Why should we be surprised when the MAGA elite act like fascists…isn’t this a foregone conclusion that this is who they are?

Their goal is to exhaust and distract you by being bombastic.

Let’s keep up the good fight. Allow them to keep showing us who they are. And we will keep up our work.

When people leave cults, they need people on the outside to help them reintegrate into society.

We on the left need to be thinking about this. Let’s find ways to hold boundaries and accountability without being cruelly punitive.