The Dark Overlord

SPOILER ALERT

At the museum with year 3rd graders, and talking about how cool these swords are.
Year 3 kid, completely serious: "I'm really sorry you can't have one, Dark Overlord"
Because he gets me #TeacherLife

Year 4 student: why do you look so pretty?
Me: I always look pretty.
Student: ... Sure.
#Dick #SheIsNotWrong #TeacherLife

Additionally, here's my new tattoo

I now have 8 tattoos. Almost all of them either took 10 minutes or 10 hours. Not a single one was planned before I walked into the shop. I also have an entire album of tattoo ideas I've been kicking around for years and have not even gotten close to actually getting. Decision paralysis for real tho

Further update: we had a module on Critical Discourse Analysis and discussed racism and dog-whistling and he didn't just make direct eye contact with me the whole time so I think we're fighting now.

Just an update, the kid's parents are apparently both metalheads, and have 1) hailed me as The Chosen One who found metal their kid actually liked and 2) have asked for recommendations

I wouldn't let Apollo in my lap because I'm writing my final exam paper and he threw a tantrum and knocked my fork off the table. What a spoiled brat.
Pictured: the menace in question

And to answer before you ask, yes, I'm already planning to do an outfit similar to her debate outfit. Obviously.

I have reduced the number of movie references and jokes to 6. I have also recruited a classmate to help me make one of them land, because I doubt anyone in the class is old enough to do it organically and the teacher who would know the quote is too professional.

Related to previous, I'm doing an academic oral presentation on a student paper analyzing the Swedish translation of the 1995 American movie Clueless, which is a fictionalized documentary, and it's taking all my will power not to do the entire thing as Cher.

The fact that I have to quote someone else saying something is true instead of saying "I know it's true because I was there" is why academic writing is fucking lame.

You can absolutely never accuse Apollo of being smart, but he *is* very cute.

On a video chat
Me: and here's Apollo, the dumb one
Apollo: *jumps off the back of the couch, into the balcony door*
Both of us: *silent pause, laughing*
Me: I... Dunno if you realize what just happened
KATOR: He jumped off the couch and into the door?
Me: as I was saying he's the dumb one, yes

My students complained about the fact that I've stopped wearing long, fake nails and apparently the only peer pressure I cave to is from children.

a close up of a cartoon monkey 's face with a surprised look on his face ALT: a close up of a cartoon monkey 's face with a surprised look on his face

Me, lazy, showing my year 1 students the Blood and Glitter Eurovision performance of #LordOfTheLost
The giggly one: Is that a woman?
The normie one: He's scary
The quiet one:
#TheMetalheadAwakening #WelcomeToTheTribeMyChild

Update:
Teacher: So what topic were you thinking about for your thesis?
Me: In a shocking twist, it's going to be about the linguistic impact of colonialism
Teacher: What a surprise!

Told you he gets me.

A student was very excited to show me that she had made friends with a tiny spider which didn't want to leave, and it was very hard for me to have to tell her that it was, in fact, actually a tick.

I broke the children while leaving work early to go to class.

Kid: Are you going home early?
Me: nope, I'm going to school.
Kid: ... but... this is school...?

I'm not completely healthy yet, but today is a mandatory roll call for my final term for my degree, and I get to see the teacher who always says "other than colonialism" whenever I raise my hand to answer his questions. I missed him, he gets me.

a man with a beard and afro is making a funny face while wearing a white tank top . ALT: a man with a beard and afro is making a funny face while wearing a white tank top .

The Elder Eunuch killed a bird, somehow, on my netted-in balcony. Thankfully, it was already dead so I didn't have to put it out of its misery, but that was... A lot. Meanwhile I'm having to not scold my cat for just doing cat things. What a... good hunter, buddy. That wasn't gross OR terrifying.

I know that the person who does the singing voice for Megara in Hercules isn't Bernadette Peters, but in my heart I still refuse to believe it isn't.

A vehicle just backed up and made a tone that was the EXACT SOUND of that first pitch from old AOL dial-up and it was like simultaneously an itch in my brain got scratched and some deeply rooted sleeper agent thing got triggered

"sanku for bing my ticher at Swedish langwich"

My Ukrainian refugee student made this for me and it's the cutest combination of English words, Swedish grammar, and the phonetic spelling of her Ukrainian-accented word pronunciation. Every time I feel burned out, things like this remind me why I do what I do #TeacherLife

a cartoon character is holding a stuffed animal in his hands ALT: a cartoon character is holding a stuffed animal in his hands

We had a heat wave here in Sweden and I realized my TV shows the temperature in both Fahrenheit and Celsius and I must tell you that I cannot express the shame I feel as an LA girl who now believes that *reads notes* 80°F is a heat wave. The cats were also melting.

*Persephone jumps on my bed*
Me: Hi baby!
*a thud in the distance*
*distant jingling getting closer, feet pounding*
*Apollo Tokyo Drifts his way to my beside*
Apollo: Mrrp?

Apollo is baby and wants to make sure I know it at all times

"...and next week we'll talk about modern depictions of Vikings and viking culture, spoiler alert: it's all fascism"
My teacher in this summer class I decided to take

I didn't have the energy to correct him, and knew it wouldn't matter anyway. So I just let him be wrong, and he showed the entire department his whole dumb ass by using the word in a presentation.

This post is about politics.
(4/4)

After a while he came to me, triumphant, because some other random and equally incorrect person had posted about this online and validated his incorrect opinion, despite the avalanche of reputable, unbiased, trackable evidence to the contrary. (3/4)

I told him I understood what he was attempting to say, but that the word is "integral" and that what he was saying was a common misspelling. He scoffed and told me to nevermind, because he would just look it up online. (2/4)