Kerry G Kreitzer

And the same three times, the assistant equipment manager has been caught on camera with his index finger up his nose to the third knuckle, apparently on a trophy-hunting mission. A little known fact.

Your write, Wright bit reminds me of a time I was in traffic court to contest a fine. My surname's German and is frequently mispronounced (Kreetzer). When the judge called my name I replied, "If you say Kreitzer, I'll say right sir." It got a laugh and the judge got it right the 2nd time around.

My wife & I play Scrabble 4 time a week. If it wasn't for that damned correct-word site I'd win a lot more games.

You might've been able to clean up some of those little messages if you'd checked with a Scrabble "allowable word determinater site" and found out they were not acceptable.

The classic definition of driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Done that more than once.

Or put two and two together and wondered, what for.

a tough row to hoe

or cause "skinny-bottomed girls" to become depressed.

I almost stopped watching at the end of the first half but I'm glad I didn't. That penalty late in the game against the Packers was fortuitous.

Don't think they'll have much trouble with the Hurricanes.

By the time that game was over, the Miami coach must've walked at least 10 miles, back & forth in front of the bench. That was a "by the skin of their teeth" win. They'll have to do better against, most likely the Hoosiers, if they want to win the championship.

Did you hear about the gay organist? He sat between two hymns.

𝐃𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 "𝙗𝙮 𝙘𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙮"
(an exclamation used to express surprise or to emphasize a comment). Example: "It's a fine day, by cracky!"

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗶𝘂𝘀 say,"𝓦𝓸𝓶𝓪𝓷 𝔀𝓱𝓸 𝓼𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝓭𝓸𝔀𝓷 𝓫𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓷𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓭, 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓷𝓸 𝓱𝓪𝓲𝓻 𝓫𝔂 𝓬𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓴𝔂."
Just one of many 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗶𝘂𝘀 sayings.

A pirate walks into a bar with a small steering wheel on the front of his pants. The bartender asks, “What’s that?” The pirate replies, “I don’t know, but it’s driving me nuts.”

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender asks, “Olive or twist?”

That's what's keeping Canada from becoming the 51st state.

See attached:

Years ago I proposed that one of the major tobacco companies should market a cigarette called "Less". That way when asked hows the quitting smoking going, a smoker can wheeze and cough and say "I'm really smoking less."

I like the way he's hidden his horns under his cap. And is that Epstein starting to slither out from under the Christmas tree?

Yes, and I really had to bare down and bone up on all the regulations before they let me take over from Ernie, the old Greeter. Ernie bared his soul to me and told me he could barely keep it up any more and was afraid the owners would fire him. I could see the naked look of fear in his eyes. So sad.

I worked in a nudist camp for 2 years after my wife split. She took me for everything including the shirt off my back. The owners made me a Greeter. The new recruits always arrived fully clothed and I'd tell them I had a lengthy list of regulations to read and I always asked them to bare with me.

I went dressed as a whole-ass but people kept saying I had it wrong. They said I was an ass-whole.

I know I would qualify in the Triple Event: eating, drinking wine & sleeping

I've seen similar occurrences at curling bonspiels.

Every 8 hours I drag myself away from the computer, crawl out of the man-cave and go in search of my wife. She's usually in the sun room reading or she's on her laptop. I wave and we exchange verbal pleasantries, then it's back to the cave. The shift is usually, 6AM - 1:00PM & 1:30 to 6:00PM.

We can all 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐩et those sentiments!

Pizza is my favorite food, breakfast, lunch or supper, hot or cold. When I hear the word pizza, I always recall an old joke about an Italian gentleman who hired a contractor to build a house. (see attached).

Hey, we've had so much snow here in Goderich, Ontario, [Canada], in the last 3 days (28 inches), and it's still falling, that our view of Lake Huron is snow-covered to the distant horizon. All the streets are bordered with 3-4 ft. snowbanks from the town plows. It's like a throwback to the 60's.

A very sad affair. I'm sure at Rob's and his wife's funeral the well known phrase, "ashes to ashes..." will be spoken, unlike when the current POTUS bites the dust, when the words may be slightly altered to "ashes to asshole".

In a more(?) contemporary tone and usage, some say when you're conducting business in the "salle de bains" you are
"riding the porcelain pony".