Jay Castration

Moved out too just the other month! I hope you settle in well.

the new villain(?) they're setting up in the new batman is such a baddie she could LITERALLY fix me! ! ! ! ! !

coke tastes better depending on the container
-sodastream/fast food joint diluted syrup (slightly better than water)
-bottle (mid)
-can (excellent)
-glass bottle (nectar of the gods, an anachronistic delight one can only experience on special occasions)

Pant leg, relax

Think I just ate a sock guys

putting my flaccid penis into a key mold and letting it get hard so it forms around the mold like a bonsai tree so that i'll never loose the key to my apartment again

i think coolsville SUCKS!

forgot to mention that i can't even run the fucking game at higher than like, generously, 20fps, even in enclosed areas. Isn't that crazy? i can run cyberpunk flawlessly and it was being developed at the same fucking time!!!!!! not to mention the fact that i crashed several times, too.

spent so long clicking "not interested" on all the "VTMB2 Is Disappointing" thumbnails because i wanted to form my own opinion. little did i know they were warning me

i really thought i'd have more highlights than that. safia is hot i guess.

Wish i could "Don't Fear The Reaper" -> "Let Silverhand Keep V's Body" Fabien and the MC since the MC really doesn't have a personality and fabien definitely deserves it more

highlights: fabien, although he really doesn't come off as a malkavian at all. At first i assumed the game was delayed because the story was so similar to cyberpunk with the second consciousness but after playing the game for longer this is probably not even part of the reason.

i really think this game is doomed to be completely forgotten and i highly doubt we'll ever see VTM:B as a franchise again. Yikes. I'd wax poetic about how much that breaks my heart but i'm genuinely glad to be done with this game myself

This game was announced around the same time as cyberpunk and has 1/20th the content, depth and writing. Surely it must've been scrapped and redone over and over again to have this be the result of ALL THAT TIME?

i don't mind that the game is different from the first, but i feel like this game has gotta have gone through some insane development hell because this really feels like half a game that they just needed to get out the door to be done with it.

most of the game is ironically a walking sim going from one area to the next, talking slightly, and back again to the first, talking again. youd think the chinese room would at least try to avoid their venomous reputation of doing that with anticipated sequels after machine for pigs but here we are

the map is tiny, but in reality, it's even smaller than that since there are only like 5 areas with any detail that you go back and forth to the entire game

there are like 8 characters in the game, total.

story was vaguely interesting in the beginning but never did anything with it

20 dollars worth of game for the price of 60

there are no side quests at all

zero atmosphere, music was nauseatingly generic

there are zero RPG elements - you can't REALLY build or customize a character, and your choices really don't change anything.

the combat is jank as fuck and purely a chore

well i finished bloodlines 2

i haven't heard or seen anything about Joe Biden since the election. Not a peep. Did he fucking die the second he lost the election or some shit? Was his pacemaker rigged to the popular vote so when he died Satan claimed his mortal soul?

If the teacher doesn't show up after 15 minutes we're legally allowed to call in their time of death like a mortician and if they show up again we can assume they have been brought back by necromantic means and can be killed to death again

I wear gold underwear so you know my penis is inflation-proof

You know, I really think radio stations are a neat way to find new music especially if you find one you actually like the music of even if you have to sit through some garbage. But I can't sit through a single advertisement without actually clawing my eyes out and shoving a screwdriver into my ears

my glasses are rapidly approaching The Point of No Return where they are too scuffed up and damaged to see out of properly

clifford the big fat cunt

This is me if you even care

how the fuck do people know what kind of mattress they like i've only ever tried and had a sample size of one: the rock-hard pseudo-mattress i've been sleeping in for a decade

Where do you think? From Pacifica? That trash from the sea no good. Make you sick