James Roach

New author bio just dropped.

Ooooh fancy cold fit.

I absolutely thought for a second that you’ve had 28 cat accidents and I vowed to NEVER let you drive me ANYWHERE.

69 new plants. Nice.

I honestly thought you meant how many billionaires can we kill as possibly as we can and…that’s a mood.

Calm down with that exorbitant spending!

Police cruiser among overgrown grass and weeds.

Police cruiser among overgrown weeds and pot plants.

Long story short, these shirts from @foreveryone.bsky.social finally arrived the other day. I love them.

Also, they are some super sweet people. Go buy some things.

Good job! If I ever got cancer, I’d be hilarious about it.

That child is 53 years old and owns a Jewish deli.

Omg 🤦🏻‍♂️😂

RUDE

In the last 2 years, 5 relatives have died. I no longer answer my phone.

According to science, plants grow better with music or singing.

And the smell of freshly mowed grass is actually a signal that grass sends out when there’s danger. The danger being quick be-headings.

Ma’am (respectfully)…that is an all the time dessert. You’re doing great. Good job.

Ooooooh that’s gonna be a poem. I will absolutely credit you if it gets published, Raccoon Overlord.

Every blurred line of quiet graphite erased to a soft rip in the paper. Goodbye meant come back in curved ink, a perennial bloom fulfilled on the vine.

5 poems published by the wonderful @periwinklepelican.bsky.social. Thank you for giving them a safe and loving home.🥰