Drew Schnoebelen

The Portland frog backing down an army of jackboots

When your custom character appears in a cut scene

This is easily how you let these people know how you feel. Hit them in the wallet.

The SPEED with which my paramount account was nuked the moment this happened.

@eliyudin.com is the best

YouTube video by Cracked Comedy Club Humble Offering | Stand Up Comedy | Eli Yudin Full Special

All right enough about the blood money comedians. Let’s talk GOOD comedians. I saw @davidjroth.bsky.social link to this special once and it had me dying. youtu.be/g9NT46SGqFY?...

Y’all posted too much and got too weird about the Travis Kelce dick song that now I’ve decided it’s a banger. Get that D, girl. Good for you. Congrats on the hog, brother.

Oh no, they’re onto us

There are still heroes out there, pushing back.

i guess ICE is just driving around the city and finding busy areas they can tear gas for fun

really seems like @govpritzker.illinois.gov is talking out of both sides of his mouth. either step in or stop pretending.

This is wild

I’m sure eventually things will get better somewhere, somehow. But man, every corner looking prettttttty bleak right now.

The world is so bad and The Pitt is so good. Less things that make the world bad and more seasons of The Pitt.

At CVS to get my COVID/FLU shots and the pharmacist asked two people in front of me if they’d like their COVID/FLU shots today and both scoffed and said no indignantly. People are just so broken, man.

We are sending rotten pool noodles to fight an oncoming wave of fascism.

The New York Times later today:

silly rules! who needs them? just run in and start shooting! nothing bad has ever happened when that was the plan!

Is he? Tis the season

So you’re rooting for Michael B. Jordan this year then

Hell of a damn sunset

Sunset is TOO good right now, it cannot be trusted. Beware.

I mean I agree, I do think OP likely just meant those white comedians without taking anything else about them (popularity levels vs. Chappelle and the like) into account.

Louis CK (likely the person in question), Bill Burr, and Pete Davidson are all going

Game rules, love it so much

PANEL 1: MATTIE, walking with a FRIEND on the street. The FRIEND points at his own head. MATTIE: Hey what's on your hat there FRIEND: Oh, this old thing? I guess I'm a big fan! PANEL 2: A close-up of the hat, which has a logo of a snake, blood dripping from its mouth. Under it, it says "SSSSUPER" MATTIE (OFFSCREEN): Of the enormous snakes the US Army bred to eat random children? The ones currently besieging the city? FRIEND: To be honest I wasn't even thinking about it when I threw it on. PANEL 3: Another PERSON walks by wearing the same hat. She gives the thumbs-up to the FRIEND, who looks at MATTIE, concerned. PERSON 3: Hey, cool hat! FRIEND: You okay? MATTIE: I guess that makes me sort of disappointed and angry to know you! PANEL 4: The FRIEND spreads his arms wide. The other PERSON pokes out behind him. In the far background, you can see the tail of a snake poke above the buildings. FRIEND: Why do you HAVE TO BRING POLITICS INTO EVERYTHING?! PERSON 3: Rude!

bringing politics into everything | patreon.com/lubchansky

i like how often we gotta be like "did the guy who shot a bunch of strangers support a culture of fear and guns or free medicine and housing"

Hi! I borrowed $300m from the worst people in the world to buy your favourite thing! Now your favourite thing owes me $300m and sadly it looks like it can’t pay me back so I’ve taken it out back and shot it. Anyways, just wanted to ask… what’s your *second* favourite thing?

"fictional"