Allison Online

When I use Spray n Wipe I hold the bottle sideways to intimidate the dirt and grime

i would enjoy chores more if they unlocked some cool loot like a new hairstyle or a weapon

we did it babes.... we're the opposite of cooked. what is that. we're ingredients

Panel 1: It's a wooden doorway in a blue-walled room. The walls have white trim, the doorway has yellow trim, and the floor is a brown. Someone is yelling through the door, "THERE BETTER NOT BE ANY YURI HAPPENING IN THERE!!" In the room various noises are heard like "BAM", "SHIIIINGG", "BAM" (again), and "CRASH" Panel 2: The yeller, now revealed to be Shen, kicks open the door with a sour, frustrated expression. Panel 3: The people in the room are two girls in the midst of violent combat, one wielding double uzis (black dress, blonde hair, messy ponytail, bullet belt over shoulder), and the other a katana (dark green sweatpants, red sneakers, white tank top, straight dark brown hair). They are both looking at Shen, the uzis girl having just stopped firing, with the smoke still coming off her guns, and the katana girl having stopped mid-swing at the uzi girl's head. Panel 4: Shen points at them, infuriated, his face cloaked in shadow, yelling "I SAID NO YURI"

why does "we must go back" always mean racism and not quaaludes

SWING THE BAT YOU BUM

i should be able to click a button at the beginning of a sports season that says “i’m normal” and i don’t get served any ads for crypto or gambling

Abcnews graphic: surreal moment as coyote drinks water from skylight window on top of Los Angeles hair salon (Image of exactly that, except the framing is canted and as a result it looks like a coyote imprisoned in a glass square a la the phantom zone from Superman)

I understand why they had to stop him but I don’t agree with imprisoning him in the phantom zone

he doesn't know he is orange

Becoming churned, becoming emulsion, this would fix me

BRO I SWEAR THE DISJOINTED HITBOX ON BILL'S DOZER IS DRIVING ME MAD

you could try kissing

sometimes i'll hear a song i really really like, find out it's a cover of a bob dylan song, then listen to the original and feel like i'm being pranked

floating and spinning around the field like power-ups in Quake

Isn't lambda calculus someone describing how binary computers work just a little before computers?

I admit I still like the trope of displaying calculus equations as visual shorthand for 'impossible intellect' but when I realised what I had done I realised hey wait the fuck the long fancy S and the sideways M are just FOR loops

Not to brag or anything I'm not the best at maths or programming but while playing around with a kit computer with DOT and LINE commands I accidentally invented trigonometry and integral calculus

Photo of square orange tiles, set into the ground, across one of which several cats footprints are clearly visible.

One day, nearly 2000 years ago, a cat dashed across some drying tiles, somewhere near Hadrian's Wall.

It's immortality of a kind, isn't it?

I’m at the local strip mall chain restaurant. It’s absolutely packed with families. The tv at the bar was playing Charlie Kirk coverage. The bartender said “enough of this” and switched it to baseball and everyone started cheering.

Great. Even Elon Musk's broken shit wasn't *this* broken

Just give me praise

This is beyond ridiculous. Hey website geniuses why I can I literally never ever post a picture? Is this a feature?

milslut pants

huuuuh

losing my shit at tom clancy's daughter immediately setting this to her banner after seeing it

this is why I still use twitter

I found a fun picture from when there were two of me

I HATE IT HERE

chub goth faerie 🖤

insp by @ztreez.bsky.social
#art

okay obviously that was supposed to be something real