Philip blue owl

If I understood what President Asterisk said, it's that Epsteinameophen causes issues (it's better known as Fylenol). I hope your show today can clarify...

So #Kimmel put the #Carr in reverse?

There needs to be a total and complete shutdown of #Museums entering the United States until our country's representatives can figure out what the hell is going on.

#Smithsonian

I'm fine with the new ballroom... as long as it's named the Epstein File Distraction Ballroom.

#ballroom #epstein
#distraction

The world needs more Margaret Dumont references. Thank you for doing your part.

I hear there's a new seal for the next Papal Bull....

He wrongly says his nickname for the Gulf of Mexico is "the law." AP uses they/them/their and "Gulf of Mexico."
(F)Elon47 limited access for AP reporters as admitted retaliation against the news agency.
Is he forcing his anti-trans agenda on media? Note: he has not renamed the state of New Mexico.

Are Dems using the Project 2025 playbook as a guide for programs and institutions they ought to give attention before Felon47 turns his rheumy eyes to them?

Actual photo of Elon Musk and crew heading into the Treasury.

I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO ROAD FLARE MARY!

She had gender-confirming surgery, but couldn't change her voice. And today, she is nominated for a cabinet position with Felon 47. "Road Flare" is R F K!

Can't wait for today's show!

Members of the Native American population have been asked to produce proof of citizenship during raids since Wednesday, Navajo Nation officials say.

People are trying to excuse #ElonMusk by saying he's Nuremberdivergent?

I don't want to get anyone in trouble here, but there is someone who rides through my neighborhood on a penny-farthing. He uses the lane that is ONLY for bicycles. Bicycles...ONLY.

1st thing I learned from this week's #Hearings: Our Pete is better than their Pete

2nd: #PamBondi doesn't seem to know that's going on in the world. Bless her heart.

3rd: #Rubio doesn't seem to have known what the #Arctic was until recently.

Based on her testimony, my guess is that Pam Bondi has never heard a word that 45 has said. Where can I get that noise filter???

What a child.

Questioner: Could you give us your name?

Hegseth: While I have acknowledge I have a name, I would have to say that it is not a perfect name, I've never had a perfect name, but it's better than being anonlymous like the people whose names are publicly known and something something Jesus Christ.

The way Republicans are lying about the fires, I wonder where in California the Reichstag is located.

Hey... that's a step up from all the adulterated gibberish he's given us in the past.

Why Bruce Fisher didn't look at the VP, I don't know, but his right hand had a cane in it. Yeah, he might have been able to shift it or do the Bob Dole, but, I don't know why he didn't. As someone who occasionally does need a cane to walk, I can cut him some slack. YMMV

Since 2016, he's been saying at his rallies, "You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in." I can't make it any clearer.

..here's the song that we're singing... C'mon Get Happy!

Concept of a Department Plan:
The Two-Headed Government Department of Exploration of the Concept of a Plan to Have a Government Department of Government Efficiency Department.