pepsi patriot 🏳️‍⚧️

what do you think the ratio of blood to cum in the balls is

people be named carol and still not give a damn

people be named carol and still not give a damn

I call your mom my ex the way I play with her box

nice.

what's a programmer's favorite drug? codeine

fucking a man o' war jellyfish but im pissing the entire time so it can't sting me

i call my dick my vitamin because its hard to c

godfather if it was irish: "im going to make him a bomb he can't defuse"

If the bomb in Megaton hasn't exploded yet, why is Megaton in a nuclear wasteland? Is Todd Howard stupid?

if you're a bug, getting taken out by a daddy long legs has to be so humiliating, like at least god could give me the honor of killing me with a real spider

im bipolar which means i get presents from two santas for christmas :>

@garn47.bsky.social im always trying my garndest because deep down i know it'll always be carrite

if you're lucid dreaming and get shot in real life you die for real

(tastes droplet off floor) ah yes, fresh cum. he can't be far

making a baby is so cool because i get an excuse to have sex. i'm basically doing research

wouldn't every plane be a plane of existence? i mean... it's right there

rediscovered this project I gave up on a couple years ago called "the missile doesn't know where it is"

rollercoaster euthanasiasts be like "im killing my fucking dog bruh"

the hard part of becoming an internet personality is having one

most people think opossums are mammals but they're actually irish

whining like a little bitch probably feels good as fuck to the kettle

oh god the blood

you know what? I DO recognize the bodies in the water. this is MY pool party. cowabunga !

it's true that you can find friends on grindr but only the ones that want to have sex with you

menopause was a twink rebirth for me

a peacock is a bird of incredible beauty, and yet it's counterpart the shitass...

meat at ball:
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i think they're like holyyyy yfuckkkkkk,.... earth