Fondue Forks

See, here's the problem: as a human, you are born helpless and per Mr. Altman, you take 20 years to become useful.

The point is that what distinguishes us as human beings is that we take care of helpless little babies until they become useful.

So the prime directive is to take care of each other.

I received two magazines. I prolly ordered two.

I wonder how many lost dogs end up at the nude beach?

You know a lot of city government work is tedious and dull. Why can't the mayor throw her peeps a bone and let them monitor the nude beach cameras?

All my best to Reed, but this is really the culmination of a dream: to follow a club that develops their talent and sells them on to better opportunities. It doesn't get better than this.

My entire life has been validated.

This is so cute! We have the most adorable volcanoes ever.

Poot!

That kind of disaster would only happen to me.

Always a good listen:

Goddamnit! Ratted out again!

She's got hi-i-igh T,
She's got hi-i-igh T,
She's got high apple pie in the sky T.

Not fair. Everyone always gets mad at me when I serve food nude.

Who can say it's wrong?

Repo Man (1984) Was there ever a better movie?

If only they could create a certification program to distinguish between lost people driving through your neighborhood and squads of immigrant zombie death squads, bent on eating your cats and taking your collection of stuff that your kids don't want and that you can't sell anyway.

God damn, I haven't been to the Five Point for day drinking in 20 years or so.

Seahawk fans keep semi domesticated grizzly bears as pets. Mostly because we are idiots and mistake them for crocodiles, which is another story entirely, and was recently sprung on me when I was unprepared to defend myself.

We leave you with a hearty "FUCK YEAH!"

and probably little dogs as well, although I have never been able to detect a Boston accent in a poop-a-poo, or whatever those small dogs favored by weaklings are called.

While sportball is a silly hobby, it is refreshing to bask in the afterglow of thoroughly defeating your opponents and and revelling in the nasally Boston-accented lamentations of their women, and same sex partners,

As happens very infrequently, the sportball team from my geographic region has defeated the sportball team from that other geographic region in a game played in a third geographic region inhabited by a sportball team my sportball team does not like.

Already bought it.

I think I'm going to celebrate it by buy paella for people in Madrid.

I was with Kid Rock people and I'm like: How do you explain yourselves? that shit was boring in 1990. Only 36 years ago. Apparently some people's taste is ass.

My grandchildren combine all of my mechanical abilities with the judgment of an 4 year old. I'm lying on the couch and then I hear "Hey poopah, where do we plug in the welder?" and I'm thinking: "Of that's so cute, they want to weld."

And then I come to my senses... "holy shit!"

I only like their early work from the 70's. I wasn't aware they did anything in 2001.

Off to Google...

Don't be hating. I despised them during my punk rock years, my 12 bar blues years, my 70's funk years, my EDM years, and my 50's country/alt country years.

But then, sometime around 2015, I found I enjoyed the naivete of their 70's cynicism.

Health news you can use!

So pumped for him. This is great.

Well I'm just feeling like it will be so retro cool to see a new print magazine go to press.

I hear Iran is available.

Oh, I don't know, someone has to try and capture the conservative thinking on things and the rest of the movement seems to communicate by grunting and shitting their own pants in public.

We are reaching the dot-bomb boom level of useless AI apps.