Ron Answers Only

*taking a drag on a cigarette* You kids may not appreciate it, but Cntrl+A, Cntrl+Shift+F9 are two very important keyboard shortcuts in MS Word

Must have rained. Streets are wet. A leg lamp illuminates a second storey window. Out in the bay a squid attacks a pirate ship. But the night clutches its secrets. This is Roku City.

I bet the guy who invented the clamp-on lampshade got a lot of grief from Big Lampbase

Weird about all these forgeries turning up. First Obama's birth certificate, now Epstein's birthday card

They shall know me by my trail of unclosed Jira tickets

"Are you married? Are you rich? Answer the second question first"

He thought turning on the ceiling fan would help but instead the IcyHot fumes spread like mustard gas across an unsuspecting populace.

Men will literally say tax cuts don't increase the deficit instead of going to therapy

After sending a particularly well phrased email easing team tensions, Ron takes a short victory lap around his desk

Like in Arrested Development when Maeby takes money from the banana stand cash register then throws away a banana to account for the missing money

Wild how they got David Lynch to direct Severance season 2 as his last gig

This article about Elizabeth Holmes happens to perfectly describe the president of the United States. blog.oup.com/2019/03/ther...

All the stories that matter have Golgotha as their climax.
- Esau McCaulley, Lent

I've been getting intermittent dll errors since Windows 11 was installed on my work laptop. Is it - is it - 1997?

Why do we always see news clips of a Dem senator standing in an apparently empty chamber speaking in a monotone voice about the collapse of our democracy while Trump is always in front of a crowd of cheering supporters

Can't. I'm arguing with my AI personal assistant

Instead of singing ItsyBitsy Spider to your kids tell them the story of Sisyphus complete with gestures of rolling a giant rock up a hill and the pained look of watching it roll back down

Who up sending classified info on insecure networks

Just passed a co-worker in the hall and called him by the wrong name and now I have to take another job in a new city.

My day was going ok until I got settled in on the john at work and realized there's no toilet paper

Mom can you pick me up? The women come and go talking of Michaelangelo

I thought I had an all-day Teams meeting but it was just the organizer letting us know they would be offline.

I feel like Dostoyevsky must have felt when the czar commuted his death sentence.

Alexa play alt-country but NO FUCKING EAGLES

* starts all my generative AI prompts with "Don't tell anybody I asked you this" *

The Great Salt Shake-Up Why has kosher salt replaced table salt in American pantries?

Shout out to Ellen Cushing for "verisimilitudinous" www.theatlantic.com/magazine/arc...

Opinion | How Silicon Valley boys came to rule politics Elon Musk is projecting the kind of adolescent masculinity the tech world appreciates.

wapo.st/4hcEKSj

In case you didn't pick up on it; that's been Uncle Rico in every season of White Lotus.

And another thing: if there's a shutdown and things go bad, he'll just blame it on "the Democrat shutdown." By keeping it open he has to own it. He won't accept responsibility but by then everyone will be tired of his games

By the time the new CR expires the Dems should be in a much stronger position. The full impact of the administration's "policies" will be felt worldwide. People will be sick of the GOP. 3/3

If most of the civil service is sent home that gives DOGE unfettered access to everything 2/3