My mate at night school English class:
Teacher: 'Can anyone tell me well-known portmanteau
words?'
Class: 'jaywalking', 'Brexit', 'mudlarking'.
Mate: 'Slutshaming and err... cockblocking!'.
Sniggering at the back.
#LunchPun #joke #funny #jokes #humour
09.02.2026 09:08 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Fight Club Biscuit.
#ASongOrMovieForDailyFood
08.02.2026 09:38 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
The Wild Brunch.
#ASongOrMovieForDailyFood
08.02.2026 09:36 — 👍 9 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
Children of the Cornflakes.
#ASongOrMovieForDailyFood
08.02.2026 09:30 — 👍 5 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
The new sci-fi Jack & Jill in A.I.
is beyond the pail!
#LunchPun #joke #humour #jokes #funny
08.02.2026 09:14 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
Hot Dog Stand By Me.
#ASongOrMovieForHowToEatFood
06.02.2026 12:12 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Manchester Tart by the Sea.
#ASongOrMovieForHowToEatFood
06.02.2026 12:11 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Re-Heat with Al Cappuccino
#ASongOrMovieForHowToEatFood
06.02.2026 12:07 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
My old mate's so English. He went in an Amsterdam
sex club and was asked if he fancied 'teabagging'!
'Nargh, loose tea... milk and two sugars please?'
#LunchPun #joke #humour #jokes #funny
06.02.2026 09:01 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
You're the One I Croissant
#ASongOrMovieForBreakfastItems
05.02.2026 10:34 — 👍 9 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
A Fridge Too Far.
#ASongOrMovieForBreakastItems
05.02.2026 09:50 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Back Bacon to the Future
#ASongOrMovieForBreakfastItems
05.02.2026 09:44 — 👍 9 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
Goodbye Mr microwave Chips
#ASongOrMovieForBreakfastItems
05.02.2026 09:37 — 👍 11 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
Scottish Breakfast at Tiffany's
#ASongOrMovieForBreakfastItems
05.02.2026 09:36 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
To coin a phrase, numismatists always
hit the mark.
#LunchPun #joke #humour #jokes #funny
05.02.2026 09:01 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
No Dust Jacket Required.
#ASongOrMovieForReadingMaterials
04.02.2026 09:40 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
My mate's booked to bungee jump from
a hot air balloon in summer,
'What's life without a little risk!'
'Probably longer!'
#LunchPun #joke #funny #jokes #humour
04.02.2026 09:15 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
In General, it's best to practice
safe sex, but you will have to
salute first!
#LunchPun #joke #humour #jokes #funny
03.02.2026 09:03 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Police : slang. Opinion of wrongly accused
sub-postmasters.
#UxbridgeEnglishDictionary
02.02.2026 09:08 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
A simile walks into a bar.
The barman says, 'I can guess
what you would 'like'.'
#LunchPun #joke #funny #jokes #humour
02.02.2026 09:02 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Home : sex worker's self-disclosing
sarcastic reply.
#UxbridgeEnglishDictionary
01.02.2026 08:59 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
The missus is really nice around
the house. She only makes helpful
suggestions, that's suggestions with malices!
#LunchPun #joke #funny #jokes #humour
01.02.2026 08:57 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Disposable dummies would cost a fortune.
30.01.2026 12:39 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Same here, got stuck in Stockton.
30.01.2026 11:55 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Great Blondie track
30.01.2026 11:51 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
Asphalt : attempt to stop a venomous snake.
#UxbridgeEnglishDictionary
30.01.2026 09:06 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Trump's tariffs are really putting
the Squeeze on everyone:
Take Me I'm Yours as It's Cool for Twats.
#LunchPun #joke #funny #jokes #humour
30.01.2026 09:01 — 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Highgate Cemetery, the dead centre of London.
29.01.2026 12:54 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Novice : workshop audit report
#UxbridgeEnglishDictionary
29.01.2026 09:12 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
My mate was a scaffolder, which came
in useful after all the work his missus
had done!
#LunchPun #joke #humour #jokes #funny
29.01.2026 09:10 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Lawyer advocate believer in truth justice facts evidence accountability & the rule of law. Animal lover & patent inventor. I love watermelon. My country is in shambles. Quality dad jokes fashion & sports. Opinions mine not my employer's.
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