RoninQueen 👑

My electric blanket still has 3 hours left on it. I'm up and have my shoes on. This sucks.

There is a warm, purring kitty on top of it so I'll leave it on I guess...

2017 actually, if I remember correctly. So not quite a decade, but close! I started that streak on T-word's first inauguration day. I'd been playing for a little while before that.

Just learned I'm four months too late to qualify as a Bluesky elder. 🙄

Darn. I still feel pretty damn old. Probably because I was on Twitter so long.

My Steam account is damn near old enough to vote. And my Gmail is from when you had to have an invite. I traded a tattoo design for it. 😆

That is a very beautiful Bean. 🥰

No, I just don't want to step in cat barf on my way to the bathroom...

Anyway I'm done yapping and thinking for today as well. Time to mindlessly scroll till I get sleepy enough to go to bed. And then wake up at 7 AM. 🙄

I feel like the chances of me just completely crashing out tomorrow are strong. My blood pressure always jumps when I'm in that place anyway, and it's really pretty easy to make me cry. Gonna have to make sure I wake up in time to eat breakfast and take my meds in the morning.

I have to ask what growing metastases say about the treatment I'm on as well. And I have to ask if they absolutely have to pump me full of steroids every treatment. Oh and I have to get a shot in the ass and deal with treatment as well.

I have to make a demand that they take me off the nasty anti nausea stuff because it fucking sucks and I can literally make myself gag just thinking about it. I will probably have to also demand information or referrals for the other stuff that's going on with my heart and liver.

I ate the last of my taco soup. The last two bean soups are gonna go in the freezer though. My tummy said no more.

Really glad I have my shitty sugar free ginger ale at least, hopefully it calms down.

Tomorrow I have to do all the exhausting mental load stuff. First thing. Ugh.

Dinner done, laundry done, table cleared, cabinets cleared out, paperwork gone through, shower taken, ostomy changed, outfit for tomorrow picked out, garbage gathered up, silly little dances danced.

I'm done. My stomach is mad about my food choices, which isn't great right before chemo. Bleh.

I also had my eye on a different, longer blue one that's not terribly expensive, maybe I'll pick that up when I get paid, if I can get through next month a little more reasonably. So much stupid stuff is up in the air currently. It's kind of exhausting.

Soldiering on though!

Other thing I found while cleaning off my table: the blue wig I bought myself in case my hair loss got stupid. We're approaching that point, so I tried it on, and...it's not great.

I still have a pink one that I really like around here somewhere. Maybe I'll wear a hat tomorrow. 😔

Laundry is done, table is 75% done. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting the net hung up tonight, but that's okay. I'll get to it. I found my yardstick, which I needed to put it up, anyway.

I still gotta shower, eat dinner (in the microwave), and pack my shit for tomorrow. I can do that by 11, right?

Anyway, I have weird and awesome taste in music. 😎 It makes me so happy. Life is about variety and novelty and experiences and memories and my music collection is crazy full of all of that. 💜

But it's pretty cool to be able to stream my own stuff sometimes too 😁

And sometimes you were around for a moment in Internet history 16 years ago and there's just a phenomenal song you got the mp3 of because you were a member of a community and it's still EXCELLENT

...but it makes you feel old 😅

I'm so happy I had the presence of mind to spend the weeks of boring Zoom meetings and pointless training videos from COVID to multitask and rip everything I didn't already have on my hard drive. I keep that music folder on my computer always. Even if iBroadcast beefs it, I still have all of it.

And even though no machine I currently use has a disc drive, it doesn't matter. I have the discs in my closet, but I don't need em. Got a lot of weird stuff like that from MAGFests and the Japanese bookstore in NYC and this awesome media store in DC that I love and desperately wanna go to again...

The coolest thing about still having access to every CD I ever owned (just about!) is that if the rights change hands, I can still listen to it. I also have it backed up on my hard drive. No Malice Mizer on streaming? I bought the CDs from Japan my senior year of high school!

Having more fun singing and poking through my music collection than being productive at the moment and that is actually great.

I use Qobuz now for streaming music, but I use iBroadcast for my actual owned music collection and that's where I'm playing today. I have many good playlists.

YouTube video by WOODKID Woodkid - Iron (Official Video)

Anyway we're not friends anymore and this song still fucking rules.

youtu.be/vSkb0kDacjs?...

...I did not know it was apparently in Assassin's Creed. 🤷‍♀️

This song I really love just came up on my playlist...I stopped listening to it for awhile because a friend (at the time) kept bitching that it was "all I ever listened to"

Yeah, because it fucking rules and makes my heart feel like it's gonna explode out of my chest.

Sorry, absolutely not sorry.

I guess I'll keep it around in case my sugar drops...I still have full sugar ginger ale for the same reason. (That and the sugar free stuff is kinda bleh...)

Laundry and table clearing are under way. Might stop to cook some dinner.

I still have ramen for if I get sick; they don't need more. I also still have a full box of Italian ice in my freezer...I would happily give it to anyone who lives locally but all my friends are at least 45 minutes away. I hate wasting stuff...expired stuff is one thing but new stuff feels bad.

I know the feeling all too well. Hang in there, bud.

The cabinets are actually done, I'm taking a break to write this because my shoulder started complaining immediately about me lifting many cans of things down and getting stuff on my top shelves.

So long, delicious carbs. 🫡

It's chemo week so it's today or way later, so I'm trying to keep myself motivated! 💪

I also have to psych myself up to ask a bunch of shitty questions tomorrow morning first thing. (For once, not about actual shit.) I'm not sure about what's next but I'm damn sure gonna get some answers.

Cleaning out the carbs from the cabinets, the "piloting a giant robot" playlist is blasting. Also on the agenda, cleaning out the clothes bins and folding laundry, trying to stand on my bed again to put a net up for (some of) my plushies, and clearing off my totally-covered living room table.

The same plush seen from the back, where a little brown asterisk marks where his butthole would be.

Yes, he even has his trademarked butthole.

A weighted plush of Pompompurin, a yellow dog with a brown beret.

...a friend has arrived and he is perfect.