No Context Games

GM "What do you do with the fortune you got paid?"
Runner "I buy a dumpster with a LOCK on it."
Daemon in the back of Runner's cyberware "BUY A HOUSE."
Runner "….two dumpsters."
Daemon "NOOOOO!"

"Euphemisms and Hotdog Water is my Coheed and Cambria cover band."

Fembot voice "I have a chainsaw and a full playlist of Ava Max songs. Let's Fucking Go!"

GM "Rigger is desperately struggling not to violate rule zero."
Rigger "I think ENOUGH things have been violated tonight."

"The personality core we wanted for the missile was stolen by a software engineer at 1400 hours yesterday. I think he's going to use it to target his prostate."

Rigger "Good thing there was a second dumpster on top of this one to cushion our fall."
Runner "My home! Aw shit! That was me last 8 quid!"

"Before we jump out the window, I upload a block of Latin liturgical text for the security bots to yell at anyone who tries to enter the lab."

"Here I thought it was an Ocean's Twelve situation but turns out it's HER situation!"

♫ "In the juices from an oscar meyer wiener, that is where I'd really like to be!" ♫

"Neon lights reflecting off the runoff from the Oscar Meyer factory... We're home, baby!"

"So, runner, tell me about this Perfect Alley."

Today's quote from the #13thAge game, presented without context, for Gondor Needs No Context:

"I didn't know that today might involve Dark Elf Cuck, but y'know."

@nocontextgames.bsky.social

"I'm the best I am at what I do. And what I do is asdlahsdflkahsf!!!"

"Officer McAffee!? We just can't get rid of this fucking guy!"

"Tell your enemies 'Bing-bong, fuck your life!' with Pigeon brand flashbangs!"

"You'll be able to buy the dumpster when you're done with this job! You could buy two and stack them on top of each other!"

"If we launch the smart missile from the dumpsters behind the Denny's, the cops will never investigate."

Doc "I have a high risk/high reward no questions asked job for you."
Runner "My favorite kind. What's the pay?"
Doc "Didn't I say no questions asked?"
Runner "...Okay you got me there. I'm in."

"Hey man, don't say 'on again, off again' around androids, okay?"

"Okay, let's back up a step. Maybe you can tell us the GOOD decisions the party made this session."

"Can I roll Insight to see how much danger we're going to be in for the rest of the session?"

DM "The magic writing desk has a big pile of letters when you return."
Barbarian "One reads 'Please be professionial and use a different enchanted desk for personal business.'
"

"My favorite wizard trick is to use Animate Object on a skeleton and then etch runes on the skull so that any time somebody hits it with Radiant energy the runes illuminate in the words 'I'M A CONSTRUCT BITCH'."

Bard "I'd like to ready an action."
DM "To do what?"
Rogue and Barbarian in unison "SLAP A BITCH."

"You open the magical writing desk and find a new note. You pick it up and it just says FUCK YOU."

Barbarian "You lean against one of the posts of the living tree house and you hear a dryad voice nearby go 'unnnh!' "
Rogue "Look, the house shakes if you rub this knothole on the wall!"
Barbarian "Ugh, where's all this sap coming from."
Bard "Why are the roots are curling up?"

Artificer "Nat 20!"
Bard "OMG, you've tasted this dirt before!"

"My character is beyond customer service at this point."

"I don't want to cure cancer, I want to turn people into dinosaurs!" "...And that's why you don't have access to the water supply."

"This rat is a crisis actor."