Up and Adam

Hey, excited to introduce myself. I’m the guy at YouTube who set it up so when you watch a video labelled “Episode 8” the next video to play is “Episode 11.” I get paid $200,000 a year and my children don’t talk to me

Bringing a gun to the orgy

this just in from new york city: we’re hearing that mayor mamdani just signed an executive order making it illegal to NOT stand at your window and fold your arms and say “wow, it’s really coming down out there”

Like be for real. An effective Director of the FBI would be so much worse right now.

The reason we're here is that tens of millions of people will punch a hole in a wall if they hear someone used food stamps to buy soda but they're fine if the right-wing podcaster turned fbi director uses his taxpayer funded private jet to go party whenever he feels like it bsky.app/profile/thed...

One of the greatest bollard walks in history.
#WorldBollardAssociation

There's always a quote.

on days when he wasn't really feeling it, he was more like Tommy la sorta

Rogers Hornsby quote: "I stare out the window and wait for spring"

I'm Hornsbymaxxing tonight

I thought this was the best description ever:

Sore Fuckmann

New York, Passenger Arrival Lists (Ellis Island), 1892-1925

Really can't emphasize enough that my main use for this site is not to be Taken Seriously By Media but rather to post that, in the original 1957 book, the Grinch is at least 53 years old. The Grinch has seen two world wars and a great depression. He doesn't need to hear shit from you

thinking about how Savannah Guthrie had to cancel her trip to work the Olympics because of her mom’s kidnapping but the guy who heads up the investigative body handling the case was posting pictures of himself in the US hockey locker room today lol

What are your thoughts on the blink-182 sample?

I'm gonna steal the Collective Bargaining Agreement

Are you going to have to start selling feet pics?

The triple play was completed when Matt Shaw wandered off too far to his right, like a ding dong.

Lmao

A screenshot from an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation showing a pretty straightforward shot of the bridge. In the foreground we see the helm and ops consoles being banned by Ernie (of Sesame Street) and Data, respectively. Ernie has his rubber duckie perched in the helm console. Behind them we see Will Riker and Jean-Luc Picard in their central seats on the bridge. The chair to the right of the captain is empty. Behind the captain, Worf is standing at the tactical station looking down at the console. Behind him we see the backs of four unnamed crewmen Manning the various stations there.

Day 124 of inserting a Muppet into a Star Trek screenshot

#StarTrek #StarTrekTNG
#TheMuppets #SesameStreet

*catcher taps the top of his head to initiate an abs review*

*batter steps out of the box, slowly lifts his shirt to expose midriff*

I can't get over this number: in 2007, there were 360,000 newspaper jobs. Now, there are 80,000. "My local paper sucked!" Sure. What sucks even more? The void. "I get all my news from the Guardian!" No, the Guardian doesn't report on your town council, your school board, local cops.

Just pictured Nick Saban receiving a stuffie after losing to Clemson 44-16 and literally burst out laughing

they need to import this to the Stanley Cup playoffs, watching hockey players be handed stuffed animals while they seethe is the new funniest thing in the world

VE 상큼규문용 COMING ALL OVER THE ICE

🇺🇸 🏒 🥇

A thing about watching the Olympics I really like is how no one ever tells me to bet on anything

if I were the US Hockey team, I would try putting that black piece of rubber they keep skating with into the netting guarded by the Canadian team

you need to try anything at this point

Dave: It's the patch.

Lisa: Don't you need a prescription for those?

Dave: Yeah, I went to my doctor this morning and had him prescribe them for me.

Lisa: But you don't smoke.

Dave: Yeah, but I told him that I was thinking about starting. You know, I don't think he's a very good doctor.

the movie costume/prop for donatello from ninja turtles

every birthday after 30

News item: "new SpongeBob movie streaming now." Photo of a live action blond lady in winter clothes with a sniper rifle in a snowy tundra looking bleak.

Wow that franchise took a dark turn

@nathithehumbleguy on threads: Ladies if you're always walking around with earphones or headphones on whether jogging or at the mall don't be surprised if no one approaches you. Most guys won't ask you to take them off just to start a conversation. Sometimes you might be blocking more than just the noise

he’s so close to getting it