Brian Throckmorton

I’m Amazon-free for 13.5 months now.

Former Rowan County, Ky., clerk Kim Davis, personified as the dustbin of history.

TRUMP IS THE MOST HEAVILY PROTESTED PRESIDENT IN U.S. HISTORY. Were there ever 2,000 protests in one day against Biden? Against Obama?

"Sabrina”: At Audrey Hepburn’s cooking school, the window provides a dead-on view of the Eiffel Tower. Her apartment has this lofty view of Sacre-Cœur. Is she living on the Eiffel Tower? No. To see the cathedral from this angle, it's more likely that her pad is atop the Gare du Nord train station.

Aww—judging from the train on its gown, this trash can must be getting married!

🎵Here comes debris!🎵

"Why should he buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?"

The obvious answer is "to butcher the cow and have steaks," but that takes the marriage metaphor in an unsettling direction.

I took a canal boat tour 10 years ago today in Richmond, Va.

You know you're in the South when the tour captain asks "Now, who led the American troops in the Revolutionary War?" and someone says "Grant."

Also: "Where were the first shots fired in the Revolutionary War?" "Savannah?"

(Hat tip to AI for quickly computing how many molecules are in a stick of butter. Not sure what “-illion” equals 10^20, but quadrillion is close enough for me.)

A fancy way of saying “no cholesterol—and a missed opportunity, because if they managed to put one molecule of cholesterol in each can, they could truthfully say something like “butter has 37 quadrillion times as much cholesterol as this oil.”

Kristi Noem decries an “unapparelled” display, but that’s the kind of disaster Noem was born to fix! She’ll give that display a stunning cowboy hat, some camo, maybe a bandolier or two, and it will be all dressed up like a real grownup.

I bet he’s incompetent even at that: “Our Father in art heaven—shoot, I messed it up AGAIN.”

I’m too rational to pay much attention to astrology, but I realized today that my pointy-headed gay abstraction-loving child self was subconsciously vibing with being a Libra—the only sign that’s an abstract thing instead of a living being.

If you mention actor Chris Messina to me without overenunciating, I am apt to hear "Christmasina" and envision a seasonal drag queen.

Suffer, Lisa, suffer.

A satiric image I created in the days when the “bakers’ rights” movement was just finding its feet.

Doris Day—singer, actress, animal lover, ray of sunshine, and MADWOMAN OF THE ROADS. The movie is “Julie,” and in order to correspond with how she’s steering, the street would have to be named Zigzag Drive or Whiplash Way.

The Grand Duchy of Luxembourg was created in 1815, began celebrating Grand Duke Day in 1816, and achieved independence in 1867. The day became a national holiday in 1941, and the date was permanently fixed as June 23 in 1961.

Grand Duchess Charlotte, who reigned from 1919 to 1964, was born on January 23, but her birthday is observed in June because the weather is better.

I am 1/4 Luxembourgeois. Three facts about Luxembourg’s national holiday:
🇱🇺 It’s called Grand Duke Day but honors a Grand Duchess.
🇱🇺The national holiday began before the nation was a nation.
🇱🇺 The Grand Duchess’s birthday occurs 5 months after the date of her birth.