alittlebriton

It's so bad I'm having nightmares about previous colleagues telling me how amazing they are because they've achieved running entire sub-agencies and I took a sideways move into something that no feels mildly dead ended. Actual nightmares.

I'm having a career sads because my industry is in a slump due to the depressed economy and I last felt work joy about 4 years ago. I'd love to move on but there's literally no roles out there. And my inability to do admin and be sensible due to raging ADHD means I don't want to set up on my own.

So love wobbegongs. Everything is good about the wobbegong. Its name. Its flattened Oscar the Grouch face. Its frondy bits. Its lazy life as a hungry rug. And it’s a shark. Outstanding animal 10/10

Also when they explain which businesses are going to offer these apprenticeships and how they're going to improve the high drop-out rate and poor quality of many of them.

Just saw someone refer to Luigi Mangione as Cutie McShootie lmfao I mean they aren't wrong but still~ 💕

Jesus Christ, AC Shadows: if I’ve just cleared out a fort and there’s a thing I need to move as Yasuke, how dare you change the season and repopulate the fort with the bad guys I just murdered, all because I hit a loading screen! Fuck you. What shitty design.

Listen, AC Shadows, it’s me again: Why the hell can’t I romance Rufino? His voice is dreamy and his moustache does things to my soul. Cowards, all of you.

Listen, Assassin’s Creed: I need you to understand something.

I will never, ever care about the modern day Animus shit you keep shoving at me. I just want to play a murderhobo through time, taking revenge on those who’ve wronged me while looking at the most beautiful scenery a game can have.

Playing the latest archon quest in #genshinimpact I’m not crying you’re crying

(I’m sobbing)

Huge respect to the papers for finding both an 88 year old worried about the tax bill on her 6 bedroom Kensington house and a 20 year old fretting about only being able to save £12k a year tax free.
Top work all around. These are not easy case studies to find.

Then Tom had the most bro thing to ever happen: a dude came up to him and told him he was in great shape and then did the manly hand clasp and chest bump that bros do. Adorable.

And I helped a girl who said she was tired from dancing because she was too old. “I’m 32”, she said. I laughed and told her I was 44. Her eyes went gratifyingly large.

I did get a high dude creepily come on to me by walking up silently behind me, putting his arm around my waist and then just smiling at me, saying nothing. Husband removed him hastily.

Alas none of the above. It’s a big old Ikea warehouse!

NYT headline: Trump Announces Pardon for Honduran Ex-President Convicted in Drug Case President Trump said he would pardon Juan Orlando Hernández, who prosecutors said partnered with cocaine traffickers as Hondurass president and is serving a 45-year sentence.

trump: “no see we HAVE to blow up those boats in the caribbean, they could be carrying drugs!”

also trump:

Well. Drumsheds was fun but I was a bit meh on the music, tbh. Had to leave early due to the husband being tired! Will be coming back for a day rave.

"For your charcuterie board party, plan on about one ounce of cheese per person" my GUY have you ever MET CHEESE BEFORE, I would NEVER limit my friends to ONE SINGLE OUNCE OF CHEESE.

Stuffing is mid

A yellow tractor on a London street, driven by a man dressed as Father Christmas. The sign on the front reads 'Farmer Christmas: The Naughty List. Keir Starmer, Rachel Reeves, David Lammy, Diane Abbott, Angela Rayner, the BBC.'

I think at this point if you're including Diane Abbott - a woman who has never held government office, has been a backbencher since 2020, and is scarcely a government ally - on your list of political wrongdoers, we all know exactly what your real concerns are

If writing is so easy why do people argue that they can’t do it without the pablumatic verbiage extruder

And if it’s so difficult then why do people think it’s not labour and writers are not workers

If you want some good news this morning, I showed my three boys the PM doing the six/seven thing and now they have all stopped doing it.

This is sublime. Find a place where people can't hear you guffawing and dry-heaving, and read it.

We are now further away from the theatrical release of Raiders of the Lost Ark (June 12, 1981) than it was from the year it takes place in (1936). We have reached the Indiana Jones event horizon.

If anyone needs a private chef for an occasion, he’s honestly so good and so lovely as a person: www.harrymaguirecooking.co.uk

A lovely family photo with two chefs and Matt, our server, in a bright dining room.

I organised a lunch for my parents’ 70/75th with my lovely friend Harry (Masterchef Champion 2025!) and he brought along Hazel as well! Food was astonishingly good.

A photo of a brunette woman with green and brown eye makeup and pink glossy lips looking hella cute

I look cute today

Have just realised I’ve left my AirPods where I was last weekend. Which tells you a lot about how often I’ve been outside this week #workworkwork

When I was homeless in 2019, the Salvation Army shelter refused to give me a bed (even though they were available), because I was on immunosuppressant meds and they didn’t want to be responsible or liable if I got more sick or died on premises. They’d rather I die on the street.