Uncle Seraph 🐻

My chocolate banana bread got moldy and I felt like I just messed up an important character event

The downside of having an historical hyperfixation is that whenever someone mentions an event you’re either compelled to correct them or add extra footnotes

Once we had to talk about Frederick Of Prussia and I kept rambling on his fascination for his giant (literal giants) army

The one thing they dont tell you about adulthood is that once you get access to a fridge, a paycheck and some cooking skills, a quarter of your time in the house will be dedicated to resource management

Unless you buy everything in cans, in that case props to you

My son…

The irony of the most main-character energy person to ever lived being widely known as humble

Everyday I miss Sir Christopher Lee

If I had to take sponsorships I’d glaze Cepacol and NeilMed like they’re religious items. Best cold medecine combos

If you’re unsure if that’s Bigfoot or me running in the woods, just yell “The Habs suck!”

If running away, Bigfoot.
If running towards you, me.

“Surviving attempted murder” was not on my 2025 bingo

All good hon <3

Dont play with a woman’s heart, she only has one

Instead, play with her tiddies

When she touch yo dingaling

Im built for it. You wanna cuddle?

The ursine urge to sleep through the winter

Dying Light 1 is possibly the best game for retail/fastfood workers for a single reason: you can dropkick children

Then you are bolder than most

You glaze FNV because of the characters, lore and how close it was to the original fallout games

I glaze FNV because being openly bisexual makes you OP as fuck

We are not the same

Coworkers are asking me how the hell I can have a straight face while listening to the heaviest metal songs ever and I didn’t realise up until now that metal is peak stim for me

Still livid that two of my fav streamer’s videos are a raccoon eating grapes and Mr Bean having sex with a handryer

a close up of a dog looking at the camera with a clock in the background ALT: a close up of a dog looking at the camera with a clock in the background

“Presidential toxic yaoi” was not on my bingo list

Freeezinnn restinhizedonapilawmaidof concrete

I am looking respectfully…

The government dont want you to know this but the cryptids in the woods are not that dangerous, you can hang around with them

Looks like something @kinofabino.bsky.social would do

Photograph of Wojtek the bear, sitting next to polish artillerists during World War 2

Good point. However, consider this:

a pixel art of a red monster with a green eye Alt: a gif of a cacodemon from the DOOM franchise

My hatred for demons can only be surpassed by my love for Satan’s silliest lil fella

My idiot son

My body, her choice

If you see this, quote with a robot that isn't from "Star Wars", "Star Trek", "Doctor Who", or "Transformers".

My 10 games thing

Everytime you call me an unc my back aches a little bit more