Dennis

Dennis, sitting in a low lawn chair, with three very fashionable chickens on his arms.

Chicken update! They are all good girls. Doesn't look like any of them are roosters? *crossing fingers*

The one with her back to us like Jim Morrison cracks me up. Peep Peep Peeple are Strange!

Five fluffy baby chickens in a bin of pine shavings. Two look right at the camera, one is in back looking over her shoulder, one is mysteriously hiding in back but looks out warily, and there—front and center—is the littlest chick, with her back turned to us like she's Jim Morrison from The Doors! Chickens are strange.

Baby chicks just arrived! Even at this young age, these ladies are exhibiting one of the most astounding chicken skills: how to pose like you're ready for an album cover photoshoot! Go ahead, name the band, the album, or a song they should be known for!

"They say" there has been a sharp decline in the use of semicolons. I had emergency surgery when they accidentally poked a hole in me during my first colonoscopy; now I only have a semicolon! Maybe I should spell my name Denn;s?

Even Han SOLO has three friends! Here he is standing with Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and Chewbacca.

Chewy has three friends!

Mal, Zoe, and Jayne, from the show Firefly. They're standing together at the edge of a cliff.

The average American has three friends:

Uhtred the gray cat sits on a cool mid century chair, his paws barely touching in front, while he looks off to the side.

Uhtred will pretend not to notice while you admire his fabulous paw placement. Go ahead... admire away.

Gojira the striped cat looks confused. He is laying sideways on the couch, with his tummy exposed, and one claw inexplicably stuck on the couch behind him. Terribly undignified, is the situation here. Embarrassing, really.

Gojira wants to participate in the paw-placement course!! But... oh, Goji, I'm afraid you've got some studying to do, sir.

ohmygod, i just died, such a cute face!

If Uhtred weighed 200 pounds, or even just 50 pounds, he would be even more fierce than he already is! Luckily, he's a cuddly lover, not a fighter.

Uhtred the gray cat is laying on his back, with his solid gray nose in focus, and his very sharp teeth on display for you to admire.

Today's cat pose lesson is what we call, "Fangs for Noticing!"

Uhtred, the gray cat, sitting up tall with his fluffy tail wrapped tightly around all four paws.

Today's paw placement lesson: tail-wrapping his toes. The original Ugg Boots!

Uhtred, the gray cat, starting to sack out as he warms up on the fuzzy recliner chair. Head down, both front paws are visible.

Although once the heat from the heated recliner kicks in, all bets are off. Man, that's good stuff.

Uhtred the gray cat, extending one paw WAY out toward the camera.

Today's paw placement lesson is all about a single paw extension. Keep everything else tucked in, get your look of disdain dialed in... and reach!

Uhtred, the gray cat. Behold, a closeup! Bow before the fuzzy bottom of his paw!

Paw placement, technical edition:
Tonight, Uhtred will let you marvel at the fuzzy bottom of his paw.
He said MARVEL!
Are you marvelous now?
Yes, you are.
Good job, human.

Uhtred, the gray cat, completely sacked out. Three paws are up in the air.

Even while asleep, perfect paw placement is called for. Here, you can see a Triple Surrender! Somewhere, he keeps a fourth paw armed and ready for action, but there's just no telling where it is! Uhtred had a long day. Yes, you can pet his tummy now. THAT'S ENOUGH, BYE!

Mom's stripped tabby reaches out toward the camera with his paw, toes spread wide.

Mom's cat, Mr. Woods, says, "I would like to sign up for Uhtred's class on paw placement? Where can I put THIS?!"

Gojira, the stripped tabby cat, hanging out in a cardboard box as he gazes across the room. He would like more treats, please.

Gojira-san, in the Haseiba position, aka: Seder Recline. Unlike Uhtred, Goji is a traditionalist, and leans to the left. Maybe he's right handed?

Uhtred, the gray cat, snuggled into an empty cardboard box. Paws tucked neatly under him, with his back haunches visible like a roasting turkey.

If it's Thanksgiving, then I think the tucked-paw position is "TURKEY for Dinner" instead of "Chicken for Dinner"! Here's Uhtred, my little turkey.

My mom loves a side of beer with our order of wood-fired pizza!

Uhtred, the gray cat, with one foot purposely positioned tightly in front of the other, while gazing off into the distance, waiting for treats.

In ballet, I believe this is considered Fourth Position.

Uhtred, the gray cat, looking disheveled and put out after being accidentally awoken from his afternoon nap. A handsome soft gray cat on a gray chair, all four paws and his tail stretched out in front.

Huh? Man, why you gotta wake a kitty?!

My silly gray cat, sacked out, with all four paws (and his tail) stretched out in front.

There it is. Head down, Full Steam Ahead!

My gray cat, on his favorite gray recliner, sitting on top of a striking red throw blanket. All paws out in front as he looks back over his curled haunches.

Four paws, and his bushy tail, all out in front. Aka: Full Steam Ahead! (It was even better with his head down, napping. But he insisted on sitting up for his portrait.)

Uhtred the gray cat, resting on an Indian tapestry, with his front paws tucked neatly under his chest and one rear leg kicked out in a jaunty fashion!

Good parallel placement in front, with a dramatic Rear Kickstand deployed. We call this a Skeg Draggin' Hang Eight.

Immediately followed by a Reverse Seder. (Maybe he's left-handed?)

Chicken for Dinner in a felt bowl.

Uhtred has mastered paw placement. He's a true artist. Get ready for paw lessons, starting with a classic front tuck! aka: "Chicken for Dinner".

In case it isn't immediately clear from that picture: Yes, I'm the kind of crazy cat person who builds a series of ramps so the cats can sit in the skylight!

We almost adopted a pretty shorthaired cat who was almost the exact same shade of gray. We pulled up a picture and asked, "Hey Uhtred, is this your new girlfriend?" His pupils dilated... and then he vomited. "So... no?"
Cats are weird.