Bumbles Bounce

Sandwich Guy's victim must have a panic attack every time the judge announces they're breaking for lunch.

Sometimes everything is not okay when God is in control. Sometimes He sends a great flood to drown all of the evil Republican candidates so the world can start anew. 😁

President Trump agreed to protect Qatar with our military--a country that supports and funds Hamas--in exchange for a 400 million dollar bribe jet and a 3 billion dollar resort, while forcing Intel to surrender 10 percent of their company to the government.

Pro-terrorist, Marxist party says what?

The New York Times might admit they may have been wrong to portray Mamdani as a terrifying extremist, but they'll bury it on page A24, beneath an article about a missing Chihuahua named "Shaky" being found on Park Avenue.

Trump making false claims like this isn't as disturbing as the fact that our national journalists--people who claim to value facts and truth above all else--can see how detached from reality he is, and yet they continue to either ignore his bizarre behavior or pretend that it's totally normal.

More proof that Trump isn't deporting "the worst of the worst." He's hiring them to work for ICE.

The surest way to win a defamation suit claiming that someone wrongly said that you were raging like a maniac in an airport is to rage like a maniac on X.

"Look at how flat this map is! This is all the proof you need to know the Earth ain't round!"

I too support the tie, but I feel like it clashes with the angry 1970s walking sofa cushion wearing it.

This man is obviously a true follower of Christ. It's well known that Jesus once said, "If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, punch him in the effing nose, the rat bastard!"

"Say a prayer." lol

Bill Ackman must be so upset that God doesn't accept bribes from billionaires, and the Devil refused to rig the election in exchange for his soul because it was only worth one ticket to a Kid Rock concert.

I just feel badly for that poor White House bathroom that Trump is going to remodel to look like another Rorschach test.

Meanwhile, MAGA Republicans in 25 states passed laws requiring age verification for online adult content.

This is like the people at Cyberdyne Systems creating Skynet and then demanding Victor Frankenstein be imprisoned because his one monster is a threat to the human race.

Sometimes it's hard to believe that Donald Trump is president of the United States and not some 10-year-old who snatched his dad's phone when he wasn't looking.

Also, hey, American Psychological Association, anti-sanity?

This isn't funny. That ICE agent will forever suffer PTSD every time he opens his fridge now.

And "Is this the hotel ballroom where the Cohen family Bat Mitzvah is being held?"

So many people back then had to amputate the pickles from their Subway clubs without any anesthesia. It was horrific.

Mamdani sounds like a genuine, thinking human being when he answers questions, while Chuck Schumer and Hakeem Jeffries both sound like someone yanked on their Buzz Lightyear, prerecorded message pullstrings.

Because nothing says Christmas more than Donald Trump impregnating the American flag. That flag will be giving birth, and Trump will be holed up inside Mar-a-lago banging the Russian flag.

Unfortunately, a younger person who didn't get the heart that Dick Cheney received with his transplant at 71 didn't get to live long enough to see it as well.

I totally missed the part of this timeline where the Washington Post became a reality dating show.

You can also create a devastating hollow point subway sandwich by eating all of the filling before throwing it.

I'd like to announce my stupidity by admitting that, until this post, I had no idea where the term quisling came from.

This feels like Trump and his administration are jumping ONTO the Titanic as it's sinking, but I guess we'll have to find out if they go down with the Cuomo ship later today.

It's one pound for for a five minute argument but only eight pounds for a course of ten.

Sorry I'm not allowed to argue anymore. If you want me to go on arguing, you'll have to pay for another five minutes.

I totally understood Winsome Earle-Sears's answer. Of course I just licked the venom sack of a hallucinatory toad, and I also understand the meaning of life now, as given to me by this crowd of machine elves running around at my feet.

Yes they are.

In Hakeem Jeffries defense, Chuck Schumer's imaginary constituents, Joe and Eileen Bailey, think he's doing a great job, but they'd still vote for Trump over any Democrat.