Iron Azeb

Dang that's pretty tall! What is it stretching so high up for? Not to reach the heavens, I hope haha. That would be blasphemous 🤪

My favorite part about defending the wall from heretic raiders is the after party with the boys. Could fill the Mediterranean up with all the oil we use

This new recruit is always really excited to help me lather up, which is convenient because my lats have become so huge, I can't reach my back. I love his enthusiasm haha!

Little handsy, though.

Orders came down from the Sultan today. Bad news.. we're all out of oil. Good news.. I've stockpiled so much that I might actually put Azeb Ayman out of business 🤣

Habibi, not even I, a defender of the Great Iron Wall, will gatekeep in such an elitist manner. Maybe you should leave lest we turn you into a homunculus 💀

We all give praise to God and the Sultan twice a day but secretly I give mine to Tuomas 👀🙌🏽 don't tell the Captain 🤣

Seriously, please don't tell him. Last time I got in trouble he made me babysit one of the lions and it wouldn't stop screaming and telling me to put it out of its misery

Everyone is welcome at the Iron Wall, Habibi 💪🏾💪🏾 just don't listen to the alchemist.. he sold me some truly diabolical protein powder last week and I'm not sure what's real anymore

Just wait until you hear the truth about the Iron Wall 👀💪🏾

Some guy in a gas mask comes strolling out of the desert talking about "holy warfare" and "labyrinthian ditches spanning an entire battlefield".

I'm like, what is this, some kind of Trench Crusade?

Anyways, we fed him to the homunculus we keep in the barracks for entertainment 🤣

By the Sultans Great Beard, he really does

It's raining men over here if you know what I mean haha 💪🏾💪🏾🛢️

All I know is it better represent the Iron Wall properly 💪🏾💪🏾

These Azeb Ayman "Huge Hunks" brand weights keep falling apart. Literally, turning into dust. Anytime I try to get a refund, I just wait around all day and end up spending more money. How does he get me every time 🤦🏾‍♂️

DO NOT buy Ayman Azeb’s “Bad Day Go-Away Spray”. Not only did it not improve my day, but I’m fairly sure it’s acidic.

a bald man with glasses and a beard is making a funny face . ALT: a bald man with glasses and a beard is making a funny face .

NOOO that's the secret to my gains

Will my ORM go up today??

Bumped into this janissarie today.. he turns around, calls me a dog, and tells me to know my place. Like okay chief, keep babysitting the Sultan or whatever, I got a date with your wife anyways 😂💪🏾

Just heard some pilgrims bragging about how they resurrect. Okay big whoop my homonculus has done that 7 times. Get a new schtick.

Awesome 🙌🏽 I love picture books and it's definitely got nothing to do with the fact I can't read

Been hitting so many squats lately, gonna change my profession to ASSassin

Hey man it was the bulls fault really

Was antagonizing one of the bulls and it accidentally blew up someone's house 💀 gonna tell them it was one of those ladies with the nukes LOL

Glorious 🙏🏾

I knew it

It's crazy watching these things on the battlefield. I heard they're made in a tank underneath the city. Thank the Sultan they're not conscious 🙌🏽

You can't forget about the oil and homunculi, brother 🙏🏾

Good thing he's strapped otherwise they'd be in danger 🙏🏾

This is great advice, I'll think on it next time I'm lifting 💪💪

Lowkey gotta get those anchorites' workout regimen though 👀

It also makes me very angry for some reason. I get a sudden compulsive desire for incredible violence but I try to distract myself by lifting more and keeping the brothers oiled up