Matthew Legare, aka Tobias the Adequate

"Wow."
"I did not know if that was going to work."
"That was incredibly cruel."
"You just wait till he discovers genitalia."
(in the distance) "WHY IS THIS HAPPENING T-OW!"

Dialog Fragment:
"COWER, MORTAL, FOR I AM-"
"Wow, first day with the corporeal body, huh?"
"I AM NOW MANIFEST! FOR -"
"So have you figured out how to keep from biting your own tongue all the time?"
"WHAT -OW! HOW DO YOU- OW! YOU WILL P-OW! FIEND-OW!"
(this goes on for a while in the background)

She perked right up (“it me!”) looks around for the source of the bellow and saw me.

“TOBIAS!!!”
“WHERE?!?!??”

Laughing and hugs ensued.

At Faire, at her request, I am now
obligated to greet her with that declaration.

True story: one of my friends transitioned and came to Renfair as a new character. I came to viait, saw her at a table in character, and could not remember her character name.

In a mild panic I engaged my diaphragm and bellowed

“OI! GIANT WOMAN!!!!”

Isaac Chotiner saves money by having the entire interview by himself in a room with a closed door.

Screen capture of Twitter post and comment Acyn (quoting Donald Trump): AOC is Low IQ. If you give her an IQ test, have her pass like the exams that I decided to take when I was at Walter Reed. Those are very hard... They're really aptitude coignitive tests. Let AOC go against Trump. The first couple of Show more (cut off here, photo of Trump on Air Force One talking) Quote-Tweet by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: Hello Mr. President! Out of curiosity, did those doctors ack you to draw a clock by any chance? Was that part hard for you too? Asking for 340 million people.

KATIE KATIE KATIE @katie.bzky.team !!! SHE DID THE THING

BEHOLD

FINALLY THE PAPER REALIZES ITS TRUE POTENTIAL AS A ROLLED UP WEAPON TO BE USED AGAINST JEFF BEZOS

Dialog fragment (must happen rapidly)
"Have you ever been hit in the face with a broom?""
"What -" WHAP
"Have you ever been hit in the face twice with a broom?"

... I'm sorry but I see the words "Right" and "Wing" and "Intellectual" but when you put them together like that I just hear someone playing a trumpet with a plunger

THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ILLEGAL ABOUT PUTTING ANOTHER FENCE IN FRONT OF THE ICE FENCE IN CHICAGO.
THAT I'M AWARE OF. I MEAN, I'M NOT A LAWYER. BUT IF YOU PUT UP A FENCE RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR GATE I MEAN WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO? THEY *WANTED* A FENCE THERE...

.... and here we see the lesser North American Internet Edgelord, in his natural habitat... somehow both lurking behind a tree in a forest AND posting incessantly to social media ...

HAY GUYZ I CAN TUNE THE 20 GAUGE HIGH G TO A LOW G AND IT DOES NOT SUCK

I have had multiple people call me a bard OUTSIDE of a Renfair environment this week, and I am 100% not certain how I feel about that beyond "I ... am RESISTANT to calling myself that"

So now I'm gonna screw around with lowball-tuning the high G string and when I want a low G strung banjolele, I guess I have to use my father's banjolele, which I inherited.

Yes, I can say "This is my father's banjolele" which is a phrase almost no one is prepared to hear.

TODAY I LEARNED that since an Banjolele from the Outdoor Ukulele Company of Bend, OR is designed to take a high G (20) string - specifically in the clever slotty thing at the tailpiece - One cannot restring it with a low G (40) string.

[Nancy Mace shot Charlie Kirk. I'm just saying.]

That's when you can place bets!

This man was the epitome of "gusto" out there.
We all wanted to be him, or at least be around him when he was out there in the dust because he was one of The Ones That Made This Faire.

An all-around Good Fellow.

Tell stories and rile the crowd.

He'd love that.

Will Wood.

Fist at the sky!
Point at the ground!
Fist at the sky!
Point at the ground!

"Jacket Aprons"... you are calling "Jacket Aprons" into existence and I don't think that was your goal, sir.

I posted a picture of me being the IT guy in the seminar yesterday and got favorited by about 400 bots within 2 hours.

NYT went on to say that the ideology looked at them

Yes I am awake but I am open to negotiation

Some people apparently have very strong takes on whether it's required to have a take, and some mean names to go with them.

My point is that when everyone else already has a take about something you don't feel like investing your mental energy in, it's cool to sit this one out. Take the day off.

So now I get to be smart about computers to a bunch of engineers after spending way too much time blarting on social media at 2am in the freaking morning…

If an argument causes you to declare your opponent looks tasty, that’s an ad hominomnomnom attack

ok this also works

Thus can only lead to unsolicited snaps of your poop deck

Plotz and stares, y’all