If I had a dime...

Are you afraid of trying skydiving? Don't be. If the parachute doesn't open, you have the rest of your life to fix it.

Does anyone else's cat cram its nose into your armpit and breathe deeply? Is my cat a pervert? Does my cat have a fetish? Asking for a friend...

Only a woman who has delivered a baby without an epidural can truly understand the pain a man goes through when he has the flu.

Tomorrow is international, "slap your annoying coworker day."

If you don't know who that is, I'd call in sick.

Why is it that in every Christmas movie with Santa and a chimney, he NEVER goes over to the house next door? He always jumps in his sleigh and buggers off into the night.

Ways to contact me ranked:
1. Text
2. Email
3. Carrier Pigeon
...
98. Skywriting
99. Smoke signal
100. Call
#introvertlife

Congrats on a big step. What is the title of your thesis?

How is she a backstabber? Educate us, please.

If you're going to talk the talk, then walk the walk. It is actually: if you're going to talk the walk, then walk the talk.

This #cdnpoli 🇨🇦

I agree, ABC. But there is still going to be an official opposition. I'd rather it be Jagmeet than Maple Millhouse or the Bloc. May simply has no chance, so Jagmeet is the lesser of four evils.

Goldman Sachs asks in biotech research report: 'Is curing patients a sustainable business model?' Goldman Sachs warns sales from the most successful disease treatments are difficult to maintain.

Goldman Sachs analysts : The money men saying the quiet part out loud

Curing patients may not be a sufficiently profitable enterprise for biotech companies.

Chronic disease is a far more beneficial business model

www.cnbc.com/2018/04/11/g...

Nah, just Pierre. Let's keep the Jagster around as official opposition. At least he truly had Canadians interests at heart.

Feckin eh!

I miss the good ol days of murder hornets and flying spiders.

They are both traitors to Canada.

Our leader being a leader. Poilievre must be sucking that thumb and pulling his wittle ear off.

That was June 16th, 1972, for me.

Canada isn't, but the liar Poilievre is.

Imagine Kirk, Spock, and Bones beaming down now....

....and now I'm craving pie... but I have no pie .... dang you, AntifaPuddin'Pop!

Send it to Weird Al!

*beacon

Because you don't inject disinfectants to kill viruses. His statement and your defense highlight the problem and make my case.

I look like Santa ... just sayin *nudge*nudge* 😉 😉

Ummm, stop giving tax breaks to the rich? *scurries back under his maple tree*

Being anti-genocide and anti-Netanyahu does not make you antisemitic.

YouTube video by The Independent It's exactly a year since Trump suggested using bleach to treat Covid

You're right. He didn't say bleach, the Orange Turd said disinfectant, which is what bleach is.
youtu.be/PAauiLx3AvQ?...

He said it. It's on tape. It was the same time he said shining ultraviolet lights on you would kill the virus.