elpunknuamuerto

Biggest insider trading market manipulation scheme in history.

They aren't even bothering to hide it.

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Mark Twain

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Snow in Portland means it’s time to bring this gem back

Salem and Portland, OR
#fiftyfiftyone #50501

"Save the world, lie to cops"
Sticker spotted in Portland, Oregon

You may write me down in history
with your bitter, twisted lies,
you may trod me in the very dirt
but still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
pumping in my living room.

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I could accept everyone becoming dumber if we were also becoming nicer (golden retriever-fication) instead of getting more evil

Pedro Pascal eating a half-sandwich in front of a burning city skyline. Caption: Millennials chilling watching their 173rd historical event in real time wondering if they should make their car payment.

The time to support your friendly public intellectual is now. This regime will target those who are well informed.

This is going to piss a lot of men off, but ignore them, too!

Well, when put it that way…

having exactly (1) day out of the year where every amateur chef in America attempts to cook a giant bird and not fuck it up is, honestly, a wonderful and hilarious tradition

Honestly the way “the media” is tut-tutting about Bluesky must mean everyone on here is doing something right.

Metal: Everything sucks, but I have my rage.
Punk: Everything sucks, but I'll focus my anger.
Rap: Everything sucks, but I know how to survive.
Folk: Everything sucks, but there is beauty.
Ska: Everything sucks, let's ignore it.
Emo: Everything sucks, and I miss you.

A list of bands in order of efficacy:

3. Placebo
2. The Cure
1. Prevention

Also: If you don't have money to buy my (or anyone's) books, and you live in the anglosphere, before you pirate them, try to get them from your local library instead. They have it or can get it, they pay for the books, and in many places writers get paid for their books being lent. Everyone wins!

I’m finding the community here far more engaging and respectful, while still wickedly funny. Happy to be migrating to these friendlier skies.

Going to a brilliant Friendsgiving tonight— it’s mashed potatoes themed. As in, the hosts are making a lot of mashed potatoes and we’re all bringing things to go on mashed potatoes. I’m bringing beef bourguignon

uber eats: u look hungry

me: ya

uber eats: but ur so fuckin lazy

me: ya

uber eats: i bet little piggy wants a 15 dollar ice cream cone delivered

me: ya

*eating buttered toast* my day won’t get any better than this

It’s really something to watch the Party whose supporters poop on the floor in the Capitol and wipe their feces on the wall tell us which bathrooms to use.

Americans didn’t want another old president so they elected a 78-year-old.

Americans wanted to end crime so they elected a criminal.

Keep it going lol

"still punk as hell," i whisper as i pull into a "future resident parking only" spot before hurriedly making my morning coffee run

Alright. Time to pay your pod pet tax. Drop a pic of your fur babies please.

In an illustration from "Geschiedenis der zeventien Nederlanden" a guy fires several arrows straight up into the air. He's surrounded by a crowd in probably Roman dress and you can tell this is going to end in someone getting shot.

Ah, ye olde fuck about and finde oute

Morning sketch