Prince Philip but alive

My boyfriend got “Summer Breeze” stuck in my head, is that grounds for a lawsuit?

I went to my small, neighborhood grocery store at 2 pm, armed with patience, prepared for the worst. There was no line to check out and I’ll be riding that high all weekend!

Never more powerful and wealthy than being the only rider on the bus.

Someone at work showed me “-ai” for DDG (and the other search behemoth) to leave AI searches out.

bsky.app/profile/petr...

•*• Funny-Presence4228 LPT: How to win as a guest and make new friends at a raging, alcohol fuelled party Food & Drink I'm getting older now, and some of my friends' kids have recently started college. I've been reliably told that alcohol-fuelled parties are still happening, and I shared this advice about how to make new friends and be a hero. One of them took my advice, and now has a new girlfriend because of this. The key to the following advice is an element of secrecy because the surprise makes it even better. Arrive late and sneak Lasagna into the party. I mean, taking a large, catering-sized tray of lasagna, along with a stack of paper plates and forks, to a raging house party. I used to do this back in college. I'd make one, sometimes two, in the afternoon in big foil trays before goin to a party. Show up around 10.30pm, and slip them into the oven without asking permission telling anyone. Medium heat for 30 minutes to warm it up. Get my paper plates out, and shout: "Lasagna is ready" to a packed house of drunk people, and hand them all a fork. It's cheaper than bringing beer, no clean-up, and I got laid pretty often. Important note: Make sure the person who owns the oven is the first in the line, and don't make a mess. Maybe make one meat and one vegan or something... This last point was less of a concern back in my day, but we must move with the times.

tfw you’re fucking the lasagna man for lasagna

THIS is the energy I’m wishing for us all this week

Pete Hegseth’s inane showboating just makes him sound weak and dumb.

If I were writing current events right now I’d do a running gag where everyone who profiles RFK Jr falls in love with him and he sends them all the same poem

Your 10 year old nephew before he grows out of it.

Vaccine-preventable diseases are unimpressed with your consumption of beef tallow and peptides and supplements in lieu of vaccines.

You’re the antelope and the lion is going to track you down.

Someone 6,149 miles away just messaged me on Scruff “may I know you?”. Gay containment against Bill Ackman has been compromised!

Mike Johnson’s lack of spine is made up for by his strong knees, worshipping his orange god.

a drag queen says 00000h she 's different next to a man ALT: a drag queen says 00000h she 's different next to a man

Hold on everyone, Clay Higgens needs attention.

This little prick has his lying jacket on, he must feel right at home covering for another sexual abuser.

mr president sir theres a story coming about how you intervened to help a sex criminal. no sir, not that sex criminal you helped….no not that one either…sir, please stop guessing sex criminals that you helped. ill give you a hint sir, hes a trafficker. no sir, not that trafficker a different one

I watch that movie 1-2 times a year, it makes me crazy how great it is!

Speaking of Cantos that are actually good

If only her writing was as good as her racism

Thoughts and prayers to whichever CPS person has to talk to Megyn Kelly

Exclusive | Fannie Mae Watchdogs Probed How Pulte Obtained Mortgage Records of Key Democrats FHFA’s acting inspector general handed the probe report to the U.S. attorney office that had indicted New York Attorney General Letitia James.

This is good reporting and all that but here's the thing I learned the other day: Bill Pulte, the 50-year-mortgage dude and the guy who keeps pulling the mortgage docs of Trump's enemies is only 37 years old.

www.wsj.com/finance/regu...

A white mug filled with coffee on an orange tray.

Saturday morning, I love you.

I don’t care how much they’re paying him, he’s still an unfuckable loser

Thank god RFK jr. was there to administer fish oil to the guy who fainted

Sailor Mars shopping-cart surfing with the caption: if you see someone stealing food, no you didn't.

Hey.

To the woman on the train dressed like Holly Golightly with her dog wearing a tuxedo shirt, I hope you’re having the most amazing day. #SFMuni

Finally, a candidate who takes a position on an issue ruining noses (and plans) everywhere.

The writer of this article said the coffee in France inspired her…to buy a Nespresso. So, not shocked she didn’t know we use dish towels, kettles AND pepper mills.

Anyone else without electricity in San Francisco?

It’s now comforter season 😭