Riffthony Bourdain

BREAKING: ex-Vitriol members team up with Alissa White-Gluz to form a new band called What a Weekend

Literally every restaurant I've ever worked at used rail liquors or "house" wine which was always whatever was the cheapest from our alcohol distributor.

The whole concept of "don't use a wine you would never drink" is some classist bullshit tbh

Happy to have inspired this post

PRS into Mesa's is the guitar and amp equivalent of a youth pastor asking me if I know who else was a real rocker

My cat is responsible for my first pedal build and that makes her better than most of you in my eyes

(Russian Muff into RAT in a single enclosure btw)

To anyone who got to see both Wata and Dylan Carlson this weekend just know that I am extremely happy for you but also you can go fuck yourself

Here's some more "fun" tunings

B F# C# F# A# D# (SHOEGAYZE)
G G D G B E (OCTAVE BLAST)
C F C G B E ("4TH OF JULY")
C G C D# G C ("STALLKICKER")
A# F A# D# F# A# (JANE DOE IN A#)
A# F C G B E ("CHAOS IN A#")
A E A G B E (DROP A "HIGH")
C# G# C# F# G# C# (CU'S TUNING)
G G C G C D# (OPEN C MINOR)

I heard if you say L'chaim in your mirror three times The Alchemist comes over and produces your next project

Either that or he schools you on an NYC slice like Jay from Mindforce

Unfollow me rn

Eyehategod should be getting just as much love as Crowbar from hardcore kids at this point

And I'll tell you from personal experience, discovering that shit at 16 before I knew hardcore existed beyond Minor Threat changes a person

Influential as hell for a hardcore band playing Sabbath riffs

fried rice for all

Before "cook food, fight god" was a thing it was "cook food, hail Iommi".

I cannot overstate how important Black Sabbath is and forever will be to my life, my ethos, and to my artistic endeavors.

They've earned their retirement in spades.

Take your final bow, gentlemen.

Hail Black Sabbath.

Br*tish cuisine really peaked with the Chip Butty

French fries, butter, and ketchup (if you're fucked) (me) between two pieces of bread

They really just looked at the dweebs in The Michelin and said, "suck all of our bollocks" and shat out what Gordan fucking Ramsay himself couldn't improve upon

Yeah I got big things coming soon too like the shit I got growing that was mixed better than your last EP

Bands with three guitarists are either second wave emo or deathcore

Bands with no guitarists are either powerviolence or The Doors

Bands with no bassists are either grindcore or powerviolence

The thing they all have in common is me lying telling you, "Yo, that set was sick"

Here's a list of odd tunings that I've experimented with over the years:

- AEADEA (DADGAD-type shit in Drop A)

- CGCFG#C (Jane Doe tuning)

- Double Drop tunings (i.e. C#G#C#F#A#C#) (Cave In used this tuning on Jupiter)

- AADGAD (Steve Von Till - Neurosis)

- Thou's "High F#" tuning (F#C#F#EG#C#)

I ordered halal 12 piece extra hot buffalo wings with blue cheese the other night and it burned my hole like being cleansed in gods light

guy about to invent fondant icing: "what if... a funko pop could rot?"

I really do not understand the hate for hardcore influenced death metal.

Dying Fetus rules.

Harvey Milk is the greatest band ever

Geminis be like "repercussions of my actions aren't fucking real"

What's stopping you? The repercussions of your actions?

You hand me: a guitar with a tremolo

I hand you back: the same guitar with a tremolo but missing at least two strings

You can really save yourself a lot of anxiety and indignation at the current state of events by filling your heart with pitch black hatred for the state which is not currently malfunctioning but instead acting exactly as designed. These people stole your money, took your rights and called you stupid

"why do you have 12 distortion pedals on your board"

Um... it's called gain staging look it up sweaty

Bro I literally just asked my cat how to arrange my pedalboard I'm geeking

This is objectively the most profound thing I've said

He volbeat on my bush til I gel

Shout out Fatfuk

for the love of god can a nugaze band stop playing the deftones chord already