Sarah Wheatley

Aside from the obligatory "pigs are intelligent creatures who don't deserve being used as insults", I feel the same way. Very creepy and unsettling.

This is Rudy. He carried out the perfect heist by remembering the four S's: sleep, sneak, steal, skedaddle. 14/10 (TT: rudyrudyroo)

The redwoods don’t burn, they remember. Every leaf a secret the forest never told.

Your cat when you're choking to death in your apartment

Flying Squirrel Loves It Every Time

Flying Squirrel Loves It Every Time

Head in hands wondering how this could happen to me, the popular president who posted a video of myself shitting on everyone 2 weeks ago

“TRUMP WASN’T ON THE BALLOT, AND SHUTDOWN, WERE THE TWO REASONS THAT REPUBLICANS LOST ELECTIONS TONIGHT,” according to Pollsters.

I got bad news for Trump about every election going forward from now until the end of time

weratedogs v 1/5 BORDER PATROC ICE AGENTS KILL DOG DURING UNLAWFUL SEARCH, REFUSE TO RENDER AID, AND LEAVE WITHOUT IDENTIFYING THEMSELVES

weratedogs This is Chop. He was shot and killed by masked assailants in plain clothes who go by ICE. Unsurprisingly, they did not care enough to help the family as they tried to save him. Even more unsurprising, they did not find any evidence of the migrants they were there to terrorize in the first place. Do not open your door for these fucking losers. Rest easy Chop 14/10 CBP Office of Professional Responsibility: 202-344-1808 JointIntake@cbp.dhs.gov El Paso Border Patrol Sector: 915-834-8400 fpfelpaso@cbp.dhs.gov Rep. Veronica Escobar (El Paso): 915-541-1400 veronica.escobar@mail.house.gov

When you’ve pissed off WeRateDogs so much they’re calling you “fucking losers” on Main you have absolutely lost all merit in the court of public opinion

Don't apologise for your dog showing up during the Zoom, apologise for hiding him all this time

I know we keep focusing on Colbert and Kimmel as we should, but we also need to remember there are hundreds of people who work for these shows who also just lost their jobs because of this bullshit, and most of them are probably not millionaires.

Weird that the FCC Chair had no issue with Kilmeade wanting to euthanize homeless people.

in light of the kimmel news, just a reminder that a few days ago a prominent fox news host literally called for killing homeless people. right afterward, someone shot up a couple homeless encampments.

that fox news host still has his job.

a black whippet with white markings around her face is peeking up into the bottom of a photo and pressing her nose close to the camera as she squints at you. there’s a big building and some tall topiaries in the background, out of focus.

jess the whippet is still squinting suspiciously at the camera in the lower left corner of a picture. behind her, there’s some tall grass, and then a wide expanse of water that’s only barely darker than the pale sky above.

jess is outside a huge cathedral and squinting at the camera again. her head narrows down to her delicate snoot, and there’s less white around her eyes than in some of the other pics.

This is Jess. She is very suspicious of you. Has been within six inches of you all week, but still thinks you're up to something. 13/10

How could you not be impressed by a bird in your yard? This dude can fly anywhere and it came here to hang out with you

finally a politician i can get behind

Sign reading "so tired of living in an Onion article"

An important message.

Portrait-oriented photo featuring a wooden post with a rusted hanger hook jutting out of it, and standing atop the post, triumphant and at least slightly indignant, is a plump little bluebird. The bluebird is a male, and we see the electric blue of his head, but the predominant part facing us is the coppery-orange and pale white front. He is standing amidst little pink-and-red tree blossoms, but I like to imagine these are instead the extracted organs of his enemies. So let's just pretend this bluebird stands vengefully astride a scattering of viscera -- gobbets of gore taken as a prize from his unnatural and invasive foes. I'm sorry I've really made this a gross photo. It's actually quite nice. Kind of a dreamy vibe to it, what with the wall of yellow forsythia blurring in the background, and here I am adding drippy bits and internal organs. I'm sorry. I'll do better next time. Probably. Photo by me, Chuck Wendig

Everything is bad but birds are good so time to reinstitute BIRD PROTOCOL where a bird is deployed to offset endless evil vibes, please enjoy, birds are good, okay bye

(photo by me)

To the world:
We are fighting back. Our movement has been silenced by the media here—but we are not backing down. This is what our streets looked like across multiple cities. Tomorrow, there will be more of us! Raise a glass to freedom.

—With love,
Your American allies.

i miss the early internet. people were like “you gotta see this dude. this cat sure is long.” and they were right. it was really long. it never shoulda gotten any more complicated than that.

No one ever started a trade war with penguins. Historic

I may be tired and a little hoarse, but as I said again and again on the Senate floor, this is a moment where we cannot afford to be silent, when we must speak up.

WATCH: Sen. Cory Booker has broken the record for the longest U.S. Senate speech.

Booker's marathon speech breaks the previous record — Sen. Strom Thurmond's filibuster against the Civil Rights Act of 1957 that stretched for 24 hours and 18 minutes.

it's propagander

millennials will be like i know a banger and it's the reading rainbow theme song. and they're right

A six panel comic. In panel 1, a yellow warbler says "Hey, so I'm going to go out on a limb here". For the next four panels, it hops down along a branch. In the last panel, at the end of the branch, it sings a little song. I'm sorry.

Look I have zero excuses for this, but the idea popped into my head and now it's in your head, sorry

Am I Ugly? So this is kind of awkward but it’s been on my mind lately and I know it’s probably nothing but I’ve gotta ask. And be honest, because I need someone I can count on to tell the truth. Okay, so…do you ...

Am I Ugly?

More of this!

Get in loser, we're tanking the economy