DAVEXANDER

THEY GOT RID OF QA FOR YOU?

the difference between 15 minutes and 20 minutes cannot be overstated. 15 minutes is basically 7-10 minutes and 20 minutes is basically 30 minutes

im just sad mode abt this bc ive tried to convince my mom and every time she just ends up admitting “i am determined they will hate me and not in a self-deprecating way. just go by yourself.” which :(((((((

not to say they hate me. it just. pfpfpfffffffff

grew up w/ zero contact to any extended family bc of my mom > the experience of large family gatherings is foreign to me > i finally have inlaws that do seem to like me, but its not without passive “haha you took our family member away” comments

admittedly though i am going through “your mother’s trauma is a prophecy for your trauma” because every time we Do go over there, my in-laws will constantly go “haha. move back to cali. haha you suuure youre happy that you left? it was soooo soon. when r u coming back” while ignoring me

i dont really talk about my interests with her at all. not for lack of trying (shes jokingly mocked my interests the times ive tried to talk abt them so 🥲), but it makes me sad that gremmy is a huge part of my life, she loves gremmy, but is just really…. stubborn with taking a part in this

personal sighing here but it makes me kind of sad that my mom is really really resistant on traveling with me to see gremmy’s family. i know why she’s doing it (my dad’s family villainized her for years on top of her own family being weird to her as the youngest out of seven), but it makes me sad.

phainon delivers the way i insist upon my name being in caps. does this make sense.

not in the "i actually played through hsr story" way (hehe oops) but in the emotional spirit way.

i understand phainon now.

‼️ PLEASE READ, THIS IS TIME SENSITIVE ‼️
hi. i hate to ask for help again, but this time it isn't for me. my mom just quit her abusive second job, but without it she can't take care of our family and pay for my baby brother's tuition at the same time.

i just want to help her.
gofund.me/37d40050

i was dreading having to work monday, but my manager confirmed im getting paid overtime for the whole day since i'm working six days in a row so lalalala nvm im okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

i think you of all people truly understand this but 🥹

this is just me venting now sorry but also the guy that told me "your social confidence intimidates me. you're not a bad person, but it makes me uncomfortable how confident you act" when i asked if i had done anything to upset him 😭

genuinely it is a curse 😭

also booting up my bnet for the first time in a year to a private DM from an ex-friend that was a very graphic three page essay on how im a horrible person, i deserve to die, how i should never return to the game, how they always hated me, etc.

(i had gremmy mass purge my bnet list for this reason)

like multiple 30+ year olds speaking to me, a 18 year old at the time, saying shit like "you dont know me but wow im sorry you were constantly sleep deprived and isolated due to your abusive ex who i just read about. this reminds me of (ten page essay about their ex sexually abusing them)."

being forced to essentially trauma dump on main abt my shitty abusive ex + show screenshots of me having a mental breakdown in dms with him because he wouldn't stop suicide baiting me, only for MULTIPLE people twice my age taking it as a chance to use me as a therapist for THEIR past abuse

- being called a woman-hating misogynist by some anon because i said i liked the way a fictional man looked in leather pants
- having my raid parses mocked on one of those "fandom secret" pages
- the complete lack of boundaries people had regarding my OC + my creative process as a whole.

i lightly joked about this on main just now but. more seriously, being 17-19 and owning an account that ended up hitting ~1.5k on tumblr was traumatizing.

not posting anything near the actual place i live bc im not keen on throwing my detailed location out there, but it is insanely heartwarming to see a bunch of trans flags in semi-rural texas when its an area thats generally painted as "ohhhhh scary" yknow

wplace south texas is good sometimes, actually.

i will take the “hi girlypop” agent over the “did i do this right” (literally did the worst possible thing and i have to pull out the baby block set to explain why not doing this common sense thing was a horrible fucking idea) agent though.

sometimes i am brutally reminded my job as a CS shift lead means im either staring at a wall doing nothing or like Everything is on fire and one agent is messaging me “hey girlypop i fucked up” right as im about to have an overstimulation breakdown

A digital illustration of a WoW forsaken being swarmed by tiny demonic goats. She's trying to run away from, kick, and pull them off of her, and they unconcernedly chomp pieces out of her clothes, axe, and hair. She looks particularly aghast and furious at the one that went after the latter.

so how'd the greedy emissary event go for everyone else

[ #worldofwarcraft #warcraftart ]

my manager instantly went “oh god nvm” so im on lunch now and i can decompress in the shower for a bit.

me about to post "i am insanely overstimulated" and then getting hit with a "hey are you able to push back your lunch further" which makes me have to explain "in theory yes but it is like insanely fucking hard on me to go on lunch the last hour of my shift + take my second break the last 30mins"

i have multiple forms i need to fill out for meetings i have later in the back half of my shift but i can Not fucking focus on anything for the life of me right now and its overstimulating me to hell and back

i know i joke often about unmedicated adhd but oh my god i am really struggling today.

it makes me sniffle when people say zeph is coherent bc i struggle severely with personality blindness. so when people say he Makes Sense and is Consistent to write with i explode (positively)