Spooky J. Weaselbones

Europeans say Americans are loud. This is gaslighting. They bring air horns to bicycle races.

Swords and Sandals movie aka ‘Dirt Opera’

Sport idea: Seattle Biathlon

You have to ride a OneWheel, stopping twice to prepare espresso drinks. For each espresso drink prepared incorrectly, a business park security guard hassles you

#Olympics

YouTube video by Boney M - Topic Brown Girl in the Ring

To the tune of youtu.be/3TjxZ5Te998?...

“The only thing more powerful than hate is love”

WRONG

There are many things more powerful than hate

Cayenne Pepper
Hydraulic Pistons
The Intro to Enter Sandman
Hydrochloric acid
Blue eyes white dragons
White drag blue eyegons

There’s a minimum of four genders

Meme pulling the sleight of hand of pretending to care about women while throwing trans women to the wolves

It’s 2026.

You’re either WATCHING the Olympics

Or

You’re the zamboni driver at the curling facility

PICK 👏A👏SIDE👏

I do NOT yearn for my childhood. When you’re a child, someone can be like, “you need to wear a hat.” And then you HAVE to wear a hat.

All I’m saying is, if we fucking listened to women, we wouldn’t have to wait for the Epstein files

My least favorite part of the “The conspiracy theorists were right!!” Bullshit is…. Countless women were saying all of this about all of these fucking assholes and NOBODY LISTENED but sure, let’s give all the credit to the people who think 5g is transing the babies

Look, I would NEVER advocate suicide. Unless… Pfft, I dunno, your rejection letter from Sex Criminal Island were made public. In which case, as soon as possible. But why worry about such an outrageous scenario.

Ask the British why they go “sikth”

(Pretending to keep up with you in a drinking contest but I’m actually slamming shots of maple syrup, though, in fairness, the amount I’ve had would kill you)

Scientist: “We have to shut down the machine! Your crows feet are reaching dangerous levels!”

Greg Bovino: “We don’t stop until they go past my EARS!”

Face reveal. Wrong answers only

It’s not Co you Heed, it’s Cam you Bria.

Q: Why aren’t Minnesotans rioting and escalating in response to ICE?

A: All the right wing stooges who would usually do that were unavailable. They’re in ICE.

Me: “you should change it to, ‘if laughter be the food of dance, fuck off.’”

William Shakespeare: “No.”

People perfectly hiding their southern accent, when suddenly they say “Nintindo”

Someone said my review of Lost Boys (1987) sounded AI generated and now I want to fucking throw myself off a radio tower

Absolutely fucked that paying off debt makes your credit score go down. Experian is basically your YOLO college friend.

“Yeah, sure, your student loans are paid off. But are you really LIVING??? -50 pts.”

New Spooky Weaselbones just drooped

You heard me

Hey guys I found my tack hammer so I was finally able to smash my drawing hand like a tea saucer and then draw this

Remember to get your daily snack!