nico (1/17 lost)

@ the guy i asked a cigarette to and said no: how dare you??? say no??? like have you considered that denying me a cigarette is like denying an angel of his wings???? ://

+ idk if its the weather or what but im feeling a flareup incoming (i say as i lie awake at 4am bc the pain is so hard i can't sleep) i wonder if I'll get a flare up. I'm sure its just a normal pain episode everyone goes through 👍

also we take whatever win we get bc i changed my meds dose and im pretty sure that messed up my stomach or smthn bc when i say i can't be more than 2h away from the toilet

i haven't been this hungry in months

day 3 i dont even know how to describe what i ate today but im guessing it couldn't be more than 500cal (800 if one of the things was drenched in olive oil which i doubt)

anyways i went from 60kg to 58.9 in a day so luckily i won't gain too much after having dinner??? i should have more water too starting tmrrw bc im getting dehydrated af

but i think we both got a stomach bug or smth so tomorrow I'll have an excuse to jot eat 🥳🥳🥳

day 2 i had too much food......... like 500ish cal and i was gonna go to bed but i didn't wanna make my brother worry so we had dinner together even tho i was nauseous

woke up at 59.9!!! please let me loose 1kg a day i don't wanna feel fat this summer

tummy hurts

without downloading any new pictures, what is your current mental state?

I'll be having basically matcha/protein shake/soy milk instead but yeah

also i will be having tomatoes constantly bc i got way too many and they're good for your skin

starting a new diet i saw on xhs bc im back at 60kg 🫠🫠🫠

day 1:
1 coffee + 1 matcha latte (both w no sugar bio oat milk and erythritol)
1 small muffin
1 ice cream sandwich
1 tomato

the og diet was to do liquid diet but i got into an argument w my brother bc of my unhealthy habits so i had 500kcal

WHY CANT I JUST STOP EATING

such a comfort movie fr

if I'm free tomorrow i wanna watch when marnie was here again :(((

ngl when it comes to actual full meals I'm a /very/ slow eater so even if the whole thing is a lot I doubt I'll even finish it

soup is 60cal 2g protein and rice is 204cal 4g protein so tot breakfast stats are 908cal 64g protein according to mfp

can't drink bitter coffee i'm fake ana (no) but here's whatever I'm making

1 cup brewed coffee (I use my moka pot, 0 cal)
1 bottle milsani high protein vanilla drink (218 or 263cal depending on the bottle)
2tbs?? liquid caramel (60cal 💀)

278-323cal, 35-42g protein

specifics for each starting w the satisfying salad

2 boiled eggs (143cal)
2 cabbage/lettuce leafs (using napa cabbage this week, so 4kcal)
1 apple (104cal)
0,5 cup boiled potato (68 cal)

318cal 14.8g protein

monday-friday i can control my breakfast so I'll have the same thing every day 🤩
-satisfying salad
-protein coffee
-soup
-rice bowl

okay diet plan is 1800cal x day

50% breakfast (900)
30% lunch (600)
20% dinner (300)

"what about snacks" I gotta lock the fuck in I can't allow myself to fall for tricks like that

I will make my own diet plan since the abc is still too much for me so I'll post it later

had some nicotine and white monster everything's good and I believe in myself again

i hate this i hate this i hate this I can't restrict im so hungry and i cant control it I'll do my own diet plan i can't do this

taking a break after every bite and drinking as much water as humanely possible

fighting against half a bowl of pasta bc i have to eat it slowly or else i will eat more stuff and i really dont want to

i just want control