Hal Heinze

Newest loon Tommy scores a banger in the opening minute.

After a week of coach giving the team an earful on poor performance recently the Loons turn it around and find the back of the net repeatedly to cruise to a comfortable 4-1 win.

yoda from star wars is sitting on a couch and saying impossible to see , the future is . ALT: yoda from star wars is sitting on a couch and saying impossible to see , the future is .

A disturbance in the LoonyBin Force. Impossible to see, the future is (for a few games)

a soccer player wearing a blue adidas jersey kicks a soccer ball ALT: a soccer player wearing a blue adidas jersey kicks a soccer ball

Another Leagues Cup game? Oh, the answer is easy…Bongi scores.

Loons have not had a red card all season, but tonight might be the night. I could see Rosales, Diaz or Romero as potential red card earners in a feisty match. Leagues Cup brings out the cards like Bongi brings the goals.

kermit the frog is sitting at a desk talking on the phone ALT: kermit the frog is sitting at a desk talking on the phone

Loons need someone unexpected to step up and take control tonight…

Paging Carlos Harvey, paging Carlos Harvey.

Trapp. Where there’s a Wil, there’s a cartwheel

Bongi heartbroken over the SBJ trade takes it out on the Timbers with a yellow and a goal. There will be a late goal to win it. Crystal ball not clear on if it goes Loons way today.

Tonight the Loons STARS look great in the new kit. Markanich KICKS another goal. One of our STRIKERS scores another. LAFC falls to UNITED amid the roars and THUNDER of the Minnesota faithful. COYL

I thought he might get one after the game ended and he is still on the ref.

Loons win with a Pereyra goal.

Aurora win with a Cat Rapp goal.

Bruce Arena gets a yellow arguing with the ref.

It’s a 3G night. 3 Games to go to win the Cup and the Loons notch a win tonight to keep the dream alive. 3 Goals scored by the Loons (I think our strikers start to find the mark). And 3G Gregg gets out coached by the Welshman.

We hold these truths to be self evident that Loons will snag 3 pts and 3 yellow cards on a road victory in Dallas as we wave the colors red, white, and Minnesota black and blue. Happy 4th !

Not a bold prediction:
It’s a road game win for the Loons.

Bold prediction:
Owen Gene with a goal.

A Bongi brace every home game would be nice so get his little brother season tickets asap.

Rain before match - do we get an appearance from Lake Allianz? I say no.

Loons get revenge and beat Houston 2-0. Feeling like Pereyra is due for a goal tonight.

Great idea. He has to have his own segment. Tough to top Matt’s “As I am Aging” but if anybody can bust out a new segment it would be Marthaler.

Proud of Pride Night, not proud of game

Hey, how about that? Yeboah goal !!!

Crystal ball has two weeks of dust on it but I think I see a Yeboah goal today.

(If I predict this enough it is bound to happen, right?)

Lumen monkey on our back - Rest in Peace.

a soccer player is kneeling down on the field wearing a jersey that says apple tv on it Alt: Yeboah is sitting down on the field celebrating with pretend sip of macchiato.

Kelvin Yeboah with a brace propelling the Loons to their first win at Lumen Field and prompting Starbucks to change their menu to only serving Doppio Macchiatos.

Shutout, one point. Go to bed time.

Wednesday night, late West Coast start time, against hottest team in MLS? Staying up to watch the whole game and Loons get a point would seem like a miracle. (Setting expectations low to save some mojo for Lumen Field win on Sunday)

Ho hum, Ho hum, glad that one’s done.

A goal was scored off a long throw - unfortunately it was Austin on a quick counter. Not our best game, but 1 point is better than none (squeezing any bit of optimism I can get).

We score a goal with our “Just Chuck It” long throw in strategy. Soccer sickos rejoice in triumph (elegantly, of course) as Loons get another I-35 Derby win.

Bringing this back to the top of your inbox.. join us Sunday 6/1 @ 3pm for a neighborhood cleanup. Stick around after the clean-up to cheer @mnufc.com as they take on the Seattle Sounders at 5pm in the Brew Hall! Clean-up volunteers will get food/beverage discount

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St. Losers City regret trading Markanich - twice

Gressel is still pumped from this weekend and takes it out on St. Loser City with a brace. Wet fans sing Wonderwall with a 3-1 victory.

Join us Sunday 6/1 3pm for a neighborhood cleanup. Stick around after the clean-up to cheer @mnufc.com as they take on the Seattle Sounders at 5pm. Clean-up volunteers will get a $15 Brew Hall food/beverage discount for use 6/1.

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