Baja Lo

No longer parked, couldn’t reverse and was trying to loop into a parking spot

I was laying in bed when I heard a weird noise and when I opened my blinds I was just staring eye to eye with my neighbor who for some reason pulled their minivan onto the apartment lawn and parked outside my window

I was supposed to be opening my fancy new perfume today and I can’t find the package even though it was marked delivered 🥲

"my whole world fell apart when i saw jamie lee curtis had big honkers. i thought i could tell women apart and then i saw jamie lee curtis had big nasty knockers"

My description was biblically accurate

an older woman in a blue sweater is sitting in a chair ALT: an older woman in a blue sweater is sitting in a chair

Me getting comfy at your bedside

a bald man wearing glasses and a black suit says a queen gotta do what a queen gotta do ALT: a bald man wearing glasses and a black suit says a queen gotta do what a queen gotta do

I think I’m about to stage a friend breakup

Jill is laying next to me in bed and I keep turning my phone towards her when I watch recipe videos and asking her opinion about whether I should try tuna like she is not a cat

My friend called to tell me she was pregnant and I found out before their parents and I am so blessed and happy for them 🥹♥️

My mom might have had a point when she asked me to come stay in their guestroom this weekend because I was sick. I did manage to take medicine and eat a cannoli so I think I did all right

a man with curly hair and a mustache is leaning on a railing with a blue car in the background Alt: a man with curly hair and a mustache is leaning on a railing with a blue car in the background

I was so impatient to eat a sweet potato I gave myself a second-degree burn on my face

a woman with long hair and a necklace is making a funny face with her eyes closed . ALT: a woman with long hair and a necklace is making a funny face with her eyes closed .

YOU TELL ME OVER A DECADE INTO YOUR MARRIAGE THAT YOU DREAM ABOUT ME

Rounded out 2024 with just me, myself, and the Pittsburgh Penguins 🪩🐧

mood