Be, Sybil, The Other

B: I like to do a thing I call kum-holing where I boof ket and them try to make myself cum before I k-hole

378mg ketamine administered rectally at 21:25

updates may or may not follow irregularly

How To Do Cocaine:

1. Put some cocaine in your nose
2. Take a biiiig shit
3. I forgot the rest

B: I found this to be effective

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

B: I wanna k-hole so bad rn :(((

B: yo anyone wanna drug and rape me when I'm back in London? just as a favour

explains why our guts are so fucking awful

god fucking knows what sort of state the rest of my digestive system is in

this weekend we found out that our colon is five times larger than a normal human's and we're not really sure what to do with this information

B: back but not very happy about it

today is a great day to not kill yourself btw

we're Fine but it's hard to un-ring that bell once you've sunk that low

B: only every day

you ever have such a broken brain that you keep drifting into dissociation and it physically hurts and makes you freak out which temporarily pauses the drifting into dissociation and then you relax only to start dissociating again

P: We're safe.

how the fuck did I end up in a toxic relationship with a job that I love?

special sauce y'know

if I don't get a new job soon I'm going to continue actively hurting myself in pursuit of... what? money, so I can keep fucking working and hurting myself

too pure (evil) for this world

and here we are endlessly, pointlessly complaining into the void again

it was pointless when it was tumblr, when it was reddit, and now here on bluesky

so just shut the fuck up and do anything else

It is morally reprehensible to be upset that no one reaches out to you when you constantly actively push people away

maybe the fact that no one takes me seriously is a good thing somehow

the problem with being notoriously imbalanced and chaotic is that no one really takes you seriously when you say "I want to kill myself"

it's not a cry for help because I know there's nothing to be done

I could try to live a quiet little life where I suffer in silence and do my little job

or I could just not do that

there's no point when it hurts this much

I've been told I'm broken in a way that can't be fixed

I have so much to live for but I can't enjoy it when I suffer so profoundly

chronic pain might kill me before anything else does

I don't want to do anything I don't want to see anyone I don't want to be anywhere I don't want to think anything

might kill myself ngl

no makeup today and it is painfully obvious that we are going through withdrawal 🙃

side effects of sobering up may include vivid dreams and decreased will to live

i think i struggle to feel like i have any real value unless im constantly being sexualized

girl who is emotionally unstable