redwyrm

Growing up, my dad would drive in a repeating pattern of five below the speed limit to five above the speed limit and then wondered why we all got car sick.

I don’t think many parties would turn down even the most dangerous opportunity to get a talking cat.

This dungeon is BYOB

It is a simple formula.

That sounds like pirate treasure.

It is a big sexy hook.

Conversations with the 9yo DM:

9yo DM: I am making an adventure called the Dungeon of Blood. It takes place in the bottom layer of the Abyss which is nearly impossible to find since the Abyss has infinite layers.

Me: Why would my character go there?

9yo DM: Magic loot

Me: OK

Obscure pirate references are a great sly advertisement for your Pirate Borg content. No one will know what you are talking about but you will smile when you post it.

This was my exact response.

Hopefully your heals heal quickly.

Conversations with the 9yo DM:

9yo DM: I am going to root for Denmark over the United States.

Me: Why is that?

9yo DM: That is where they make LEGOs.

Back in the day, it always took weeks to break them in.

He lives with two Gen X parents, so it isn’t really a surprise.

That definitely ruins that movie.

Conversations with the 9yo DM:

9yo DM: I fear for my generation.

Me: What? Why?

9yo DM: No one my age listens to good music.

Me: What band didn’t your friends know this time?

9yo DM: Bad English! Forget Me Not is such a good song!!

I assume the cat is hidden.

I love a double feature when both movies are great.

I’d still watch it.

Margarine has ruined many things!

Add a word, ruin a movie.

The Fellowship of the Ring Doorbell

I didn’t get to see one in the theater until Empire Strikes Back.

Exactly, and this spell allows everyone to experience the joys of using a torch to light the way.

Next level petty. My human wizard is going to cast it in every dungeon.

Can I still see heat signatures?

Haha

That is fast!

Nah. Just normal darkvision

Ruin Darkvision - This spell creates a 60-foot-radius sphere around the caster where darkvision just doesn't work

Tired of hearing that everyone else has darkvision? This spell is your answer. You create a 60-foot-radius sphere around yourself where darkvision just doesn’t work. If you can’t see in the darkness… no one can.

Bunny Speed: This 3rd level spell makes you fast and hard to capture. Your Speed and jumping distances are tripled and you Gain the evasion ability for one minute.

This weeks Spell of the Week from the wyrmling will help your squishy wizard get out of danger in no time.

Bunny Speed!