Brandy Bryant 🏳️‍⚧️

Magic Mittens is now demanding Nazi scalps.

One thing I wasn't prepared for when it comes to biking in the city is how many times I'll ride under a bridge and be like "OMG it's Kyle Kinane!" then think to myself "Wait a minute... That can't be Kyle Kinane, I just saw him sleeping on a bench. Omg, it must be David Cross!"

You know, maybe Trump doesn't have the Epstein files. I mean, there's so many blacked out pages there's no way he'd let them inside any of his properties.

"AI is gonna take our jobs!"

I'd love to see an AI roll up to the shop ready to do your tattoo at 11am with a handle of tequila in its belly and not explode like a Tesla.

To distract from the Epstein files, Trump is putting on his one man show, Diddler, er, I mean Fiddler on the Roof.

Today's heat is not for the faint of heart. Stay hydrated out there ✌️❤️🚵‍♀️

Had to give up my polyamorous relationship with a bunch of trans girls because Trump said instead of 30 dolls maybe we just have 2 dolls 😭

I've been so busy tattooing I haven't put in any work on this Beetlejuice inspired Terrifier painting... until today. So close!

Just because you're undergoing a $200 million procedure to add a room dedicated to balls doesn't mean the guy occupying the White House isn't a giant pussy.

The clone of your dead baby brother be like "I'm tired of wearing these hand-me-down genes!"

I wear plaid flannel, drink beer, got a mouth like a sailor, and say "Y'all" and "Howdy". Of course I'm living up to western beauty standards.

Noticed this guy asking for change so I gave him a couple bucks and this lady goes "Don't you know he's just going to use that to buy drugs and alcohol?". I just shrugged and was like "So was I?" Anyways, support your local bums and breweries.

How's this administration gonna be anti-trans then spend $200 million to add on a room to the White House dedicated to balls.

Flowers, the literal window to a woman's heart!

Got a piece you want me to do? Let's make it happen!

A stunt bike simulation game set in the zombie apocalypse called Resident Evil Knievel.

What is Humpday? Can someone hold me down and explain it to me?

Can't believe the disrespect they threw at my boy Alex Murphy. Dude got turned into a robot cop that has to work 24/7 and they don't even pay him. Talk about indentured protect and servitude.

Just did 40 miles on the bike and I'm still fat! I give up, I'm having ice cream. But I know I'll bike again tomorrow. The vicious cycle of life.

I know what you mean, it's hard being as hot as we are 🤪

This girl told me she's poly then asked me to treat her like a pet so I put a cracker in her mouth.

Ain't no rule says a dog can't play sports, it just better not be trans.

Was out with a friend and she said she has low blood sugar and I was like "What, do you want a cookie?"

My ex came to me crying with a black eye and before I could ask what happened she shows me a pregnancy test with a thin blue line and I was like "Well that explains the black eye".

The way I and many others have been attacked and called groomers and pd files by maga these last ten years for simply existing as a trans person, only to watch them run cover for a literal pd file, has got me TRIPPING!

If they bury him under his chosen name and not Terry Bollea then transphobes can stfu forever about "bEiNg bUrIeD uNdEr Ur rEaL nAmE"

Obituaries be lying, saying stuff like "Died peacefully in their sleep". Bitch please. We know you were giving an oral presentation naked at your job while your teeth were falling out.

Anyways, how's y'all's night going?

Lady in the shop goes "You look just like my cousin! But they got eye cancer and is blind now" then pulls out a phone, shows me a middle aged bald dude with a full beard and y'all, the double take I did. I'm like "Girl, you need to get your eyes checked, cancer is hereditary"

Who'd have thought the pizza gate thing was actually referring to the pizza gatekeeping shit trying to block the release of the Epstein list.

Wrong racist with bad hair and a tan from Florida, Death.